I'm doing 41 things
I used to view falling love as something that would be very difficult to achieve, and I’m sure it is, but not for the reasons I’d imagined. But what I’m realizing is that falling in love isn’t so much about completing a task as much as it’s just knowing yourself and following your instincts and not holding back.
I already have a problem just getting “crushes” on guys. Some people think I’m picky, others think I’m afraid of opening up, and then there are those who just see it as part of my “innocence” and don’t think much about the fact that I don’t date. I think it’s a mixture of a lot of things, but I don’t regret spending my teen years mostly single. I’ve gotten to know myself so much and I feel like that is a large part of being able to potentially fall in love.
I trust my gut instinct. I’ve never been one to date if I didn’t feel some sort of intrinsic connection, or even to casually hook up if I didn’t feel some sort of compatibility. True, I end up turning down a lot of potential relationships because of this but I don’t see the point of pursuing something that is destined not to go anywhere. When I find the right person to love, I’ll know from early on that there is something about this guy that makes me feel like I truly want to see where things will go. From there, the hard part for me will be learning to open myself up and dealing with the vulnerabilities that come with that openness. Being in college, it’s hard to find real relationships, whether they be friendships or romantic, but everything happens in its own due time.
It’ll happen and I won’t rush it.
