I'm doing 21 things
My mother had fallen while retrieving the garbage can. At least that is what I think happened, since she can’t recall and I wasn’t around when it happened. Needless to say, we spent several hours at the clinic but thankfully, there weren’t any broken bones. Now my sister says that I should just “bide my time” (until she dies) and stay with her so I can keep an eye on her completely ignoring any wants/desires/dreams that I may have. I feel like I’m fighting a losing battle. I have already taken care of her for 10+ years everyone figures why not 10+ more? No one seems to care what I want.
blurred's Life List
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1. Actualize my potential
2 entries . 5 cheers12 people -
2. live my life on my own terms, not trying to live up to the expectations of others
6 entries . 12 cheers257 people -
3. work because I like to, not because I have to
17 team members . 4 entries . 10 cheers3,485 people -
4. Beat my depression
19 entries . 15 cheers1,965 people -
5. stand up for myself
2 entries . 5 cheers995 people -
6. Be happy without being in love.
11 entries . 8 cheers226 people -
7. appreciate what I have
1 entry . 9 cheers769 people -
8. own a house
1 cheer2,270 people -
9. fall in love again, and, for a change, actually be loved back, while I'm at that
4 entries . 5 cheers108 people -
10. publish my poetry
1 entry . 6 cheers581 people -
11. Spend less time fooling around on the net and more time actually working
1 entry5,461 people -
12. change
3 entries . 1 cheer228 people -
13. exercise regularly
1 entry . 1 cheer10,897 people -
14. Realize that some people are never going to be the people you thought they might be and be ok with that
3 entries . 5 cheers94 people -
15. Post random thoughts, observations, and events of the day...
3 entries18 people -
16. stop being afraid
5 entries . 2 cheers629 people -
17. control my own happiness
1 cheer2 people -
18. Have a totally different life by this time next year
1 cheer948 people -
19. feel beautiful
2,201 people -
20. figure out who I am
316 people -
21. Figure out what I want
2 entries235 people
How I did it
It made me
Relieved!! 
How I did it: Travel helped. It helped A LOT. And, my friends were/are invaluable. For me it was travelling, time, talking about it and tears. I just realized that I should never settle. I deserve better. Read how I did it…
Recent entries
I should put this at the top of my list. I am so tired of living my life for everyone else. Give up your chance of ever doing what you want so you can take care of your mother. Well…no wonder I’m so unhappy. I have to stop being afraid and take the plunge. Get off this rock and live my life. Hard to do when I’ve been a slave to everyone else and its the only thing I know how to do…but I have to try.
Passed the PN boards. Actually, kind of anti-climactic. Feeling sorry for myself that I am NOT with my classmates continuing for my RN. Doubly feeling sorry for myself when I see my 2nd cousin (much younger than I) already have his MD. Oh well…it seems that I can’t get away from myself. Where ever you go there you are mentality. I won’t allow myself to fall deeply into depression but instead will just wallow in self pity! haha
