cellogal

I am fortunate to get a work assignment to Europe this late fall. I look at the map and think “I can go anywhere, where do I want to go?” And while I’ve done some major traveling, this town really captivates me for the reasons I mentioned in my first post. On one hand if feels so cliche because everyone likes it so I don’t feel unique and like “just another American tourist”, but it is like stepping into another world for a bit. So I will go again, but this time I really wish I would have someone to travel with, it’s so romantic and it’s tiring always being alone. I’ve thought of moving there too. Ahhh.

I seem to gather books for reading ‘when I have time’, but that time never comes, or some new sensational novel crosses my path before I can go through my bookshelf to grab a dusty book I had wanted to buy for one reason or another. I’ve now made a “read this summer pile” to start, but there are still so many left on the shelf.

I spend my days in a small cubicle, no one but me. Everyday is the same. I have lost who I am and it’s getting harder to imagine who I can become. Only a few more months and I will be vested in the pension so then I can quit, but for what? Will I have the courage to find a job and life outside of a box?