I started with two steps to learning how to program:
1) I signed up for an online course at O’Reilly School of Technology.
2) I picked up a Java programming book and started reading.
The book was 100% more helpful in learning both the concepts of OOP and Java than the online course. I found myself reading the book then logging in to my course to complete quizzes and assignments.
Now, I’m enrolled in a degree program that starts tomorrow. I’m so nervous because it’s been a long time since I’ve been in school and the course material is much more intimidating than any psychology class I ever took before!
On the plus side, I have an extremely supportive husband so I’m ready to jump in!
I am fairly “well behaved” when it comes to eating. I eat my fruits and veggies, I eat mostly whole foods with ingredients I can name, I eat reasonable portion sizes, I have generally good habits and it helps me maintain a decent weight and I never feel starved or deprived.
One thing I rarely do, though, is snack. I eat a few scheduled snacks throughout the day, but it’s more a part of my daily routine. Until….
I host a food-centric event. I almost always provide crackers for special occasions…which means I sometimes have leftover crackers….which means I inevitably have cheese and crackers on hand. Cheese and Crackers top my list of favorite foods – better than macaroni and cheese and pizza and lasagna. I would not put it past me to eat an entire box of crackers or brick of medium cheddar cheese.
It’s a very rare occasion (three times a year?) that I have C&C on hand and I have good habits almost all of the time. I do not want to feel guilt or quickly hide the crackers if someone comes home while I’m otherwise happily enjoying my cheese and crackers. Today, I accept and embrace the fact that I love cheese and crackers and I will eat them till my heart’s content!
Progress on my 43things has been a little sluggish. So I’m committing myself to making forward progress on at least one thing this weekend. So, without further ado – I commit to learning to change a tire on my bike this weekend. My plan is to look up some videos on youtube and any other instructional videos and then have a go at it. Husband has all the required tools and I don’t need a new tub or anything (I don’t think), so this will just be a practice run.
There, it’s written in stone…or something like that. :)
This is a delayed post, but I want to make sure I record this anyway. A few weeks ago there was a big solar flare. The news reports said there was a slight chance of seeing the aurora borealis in our area, so I piled my dogs in the car after dark and drove out to a remote area. There were no lights and you could see the sky for miles. We pulled off on the side of the road and just looked at the sky. No aurora borealis, but what a beautiful experience anyway!! There were frogs chirping the moon was big and bright and the breeze was just perfect!
That night as I was getting ready for bed, I kept peeking out the window for one last possible glimpse. I read that the solar flares are supposed to peak next year – perhaps I should take a winter trip to Iceland (I don’t need anyone to twist my arm to go back there!).
Last night, I got into and stayed in a yoga balance that I’ve been working in since last summer. I hadn’t been able to figure out how to get into the pose without flipping over or falling down. So, I’ve been taking some classes to learn the progressive steps. Well last night I tried it at home. :) it was really fun. I feel like I accomplished something but it was also just a really interesting thing to feel in my body…its not every day that I’m upside down!
This has been a fun week in the creativity department. First of all, I cleaned out the garage, studied my new saw’s instruction/safety manual and did some test runs (without the saw blade), and found plans to make a simple book case which can be expanded on later for a simple desk. Just spending 2 hours doing that made me feel more grounded and true to myself. It was an instant boost to my mood and confidence.
Then, last night I went to a new yoga studio for a yoga class. Yesterday was the first day in the “Year of the Dragon”, so the instructor made up this whole story involving dragons, heroes, horses, eagles, vast valleys, broken down bridges, castles and so on. It was wonderful!! As we would do a pose he would tell us, “ok, now you are an eagle – really fly, really soar with this one!”. My imagination took a minute to get in gear, but once it did it was such a fun class. I couldn’t help smiling from ear to ear during savasana! I’m still glowing. :-D
Those two things have really helped my mood and my confidence. I’m less picky with the husband and feel more open and flexible to life in general.
I read a blog post yesterday on Momastery.com. I’m not a mother, but the point she made rang very true to me.
She talked about how she is wracked with guilt when she is not blissful every moment of every day – or, not carpe diem-ing (?).
She also pointed out two different kinds of time: chronos and kairos. Chronos is time on a clock, 10 minutes till dinner, 30 minute commute. Kairos is that moment when time stands still and you see the beauty in the moment. Without chronos you can’t appreciate kairos.
So today, I accept the fact that every moment will not be a kairos moment, and that’s ok. I would like to be less hard on myself when I get caught up in the stress at work, the chaos at home, and the distractions of the internet.
One thing I’ve noticed is that I have no trouble accepting or saying “yes” to things. It’s after I’ve said yes where I run into trouble. I think there are two things that get me in trouble most of the time:
First, I say “yes” to something (usually work related in this case) and then my confidence, motivation or something else falters and the follow-through and execution of said challenge is less than I would like to see from myself.
Then, Sometimes I say yes to things that end up clashing with something internal and it causes some internal conflict/discomfort. Then I sound waffley as I say, “well, I said yes but I mean no” or I end up just feeling yucky. I notice this one most often with things that involve spending money or doing some activity that turns out to feel like a “time filler” rather than something enriching.
So, yes – I still LOVE the idea of accepting and facing challenges with gusto and positivity. But, I am trying to listen to that little voice inside me a little more carefully and also putting a little more oomph into the actual execution. So maybe this should be Accept and face challenges with gusto and positivity….then execute with gusto and positivity!
Alan and I sat down and reviewed our future spending “wants”, our income, travel plans, etc. for the next year and beyond. The spending wants were heavy on house maintenance, decoration, landscaping, etc. It was a huuuuge reality check to see how much things might cost compared to how long it will take to save that much money. It’s very clear to me that we will have to adjust our expectations and also learn to do more ourselves. I think we’re up for the challenge! :)
Some things that come to mind for this:
1) work on wood projects and other crafts/decorating around the house – play table for the nephews??
3) cooking new things!
This is a big one – and I don’t think I will ever “arrive” and say, “ok, this goal is done”. So, I’m going to break it down a little.
1) I buy a lot of food that goes to waste and also buy some convenience food that probably ups the waste factor.
2) Bring my reusable shopping bags more often! Find a way to remind myself to bring those bad boys.
3) I should try to drive to work less often. I have new motivation for this now that the road to work is tolled – $7.00/day that I drive to work…in addition to $14.00 to park!
Well, first things first – I bought a piano! I’ve been hemming and hawing over spending that much money, but I’ve wanted a piano for quite some time. I sampled some digital keyboards and read lots of reviews. I ended up finding an affordable digital keyboard, stand, bench and pedals on amazon.com so i took the plunge. I’m so glad I did – I have no buyers remorse. I’ve already played it a few times and I just love the feeling I get when I sit down to play.
We have passes to backpack for 2 nights in a semi-local park in August! hooray!! Time to get those hiking legs in shape!
This has been an intersting experience. I recently read Ekhart Tolle’s book, “A New Earth”. It was really one of those books that changes how I see things. I always heard the phrase “observe your thoughts”, “don’t let your thoughts hijack your mind”. What does that even mean??! Well, after reading the book I can make that line and really observe my thoughts and take stock of what’s going on without completely losing my head.
I had been doing really well, but I had a week or two where I feel like my ego is trying to bring itself back into my brain – I panicked…I hate the feeling of my ego taking over – it’s fearful, full of anxiety, I make rules, i’m inflexible, I cry, I whine…it’s uuuugly. Anyway, it’s been kind of a fun challenge to try to remain calm and mainatin that separation between my thoughts, reality, actions and reactions. Not perfect, but still a good learning experience.
Well, it’s the middle of May and I still have 2k on my credit card. I’ve been doing ok with spending, but it’s definitely harder than I thought it would be to pay it off.
I have a date set to be debt free and have 3000 in the bank by the end of June. I will be credit card debt free by then, but it’s not looking like I will have the savings in the bank. :(
Hmmm, interesting phenomenon that came up the other day: While this is the motto that my fiance and I share, why did I feel threatened, mean and ugly when he presented me with a new challenge that he’d like to face (going back to school)??!! It was a brief feeling of panic…deep breaths and one day at a time!
Well, this has been going particularly well lately. At work I’ve really been reaching out and getting some exposure. I also got some help yesterday in looking into professional networking groups and some training.
The problem I’m having now is that I’m starting to feel intimidated, so my instinct is to back off…my confidence takes a hit too.
This one is not going so well. I got a bit of credit card debt due to a few large purchases in close succession. I wasn’t able to recover from each before the next came. I also signed up for a class, so tuition in on there. We’re waiting to decide if we’ll be making a move to another state. If we decide to move, my work will not be reimbursing my class and we’ve got a whole new set of expenses to think about…and the sales!! Every one of my favorite stores is having 40% off sales this week. That makes it tough, too.
Class has been a great success so far. I went into my first class with an open mind and no anxiety. I introduced myself to the person sitting next to me and we had a nice conversation. I then recognized the name of someone else in the class and went over to introduce myself after the break – I love small world coincidences! I’m also part of a group that’s working on a project together – it’s been very interesting hearing their perspectives on the kind of work we do.
My boyfriend and I went for a date last night and spent a good portion of the day together. Our time together is often where I notice most that I am not present. Yesterday, there were moments when i could feel myself becoming out of the present (worrying about something, defensive, argumentative, stubborn) and I (actually WE) were able to pull ourselves out of those situations fairly quickly without a big to do. It was nice to be present with him for most of the day. I’ve been complaining about a lack of connection and I felt a nice connection with him yesterday. I was myself, I had fun, we had fun. :)