crystall1




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accept and live with myself (read all 6 entries…)
Untitled

Another entry for today. Thank you to all the people on 43things who take the care to write and commment in order to support other people, strangers. When I am at my lowest, I read these entries, to remind me that I am not alone, my thought of hopelessness, of being consumed by depression, are not unique. They are common to the humen condition. In the US you all seem more able to communicate these thoughts and feelings and openly talk about seeing a psychiatrist, or tweeking meds. It’s really not like that in the UK. Sadly it’s still such a taboo. We do have this stiff upper lip and at all times must pretend we are fine. For some reason it’s been bred into us that not showing tears or emotions is respectable, or admirable, commendable, or whatever. This was how I was brought up, but I’m afraid that I had to break free of this. I am an extremely emotional and sensitive person, and I have needed to talk about my feelings. If only my parents knew to do this then maybe I wouldn’t pretend I’m fine, fight back the tears, and turn all my anger and emotions inwards and cause me to get depressed.

But, going back to my original point. You all inspire me. Let us all not forget in our darkest moments, that even a stranger can offer comfort, support.



accept and live with myself (read all 6 entries…)
Untitled

Feel pretty lonely today. It’s hard to run away from your own negative thoughts. Constatly running away from the depression. Do you just sit back and let it take over? Sometimes it feels like that’s the only thing to do. Why are some people just prone to these sorts of moods? Guess I’m just feeling lonely and sorry for myself today…anyone else have days like that?? Where it’s so intense and you feel so alone??



accept and live with myself (read all 6 entries…)
Why do I put off...

Doing my self help book?! It’s a really good one as well…Mind Over Mood. Maybe it’s a reminder that I struggle…that I kind of need it…but that I’m also frustrated about needing to use this tool!! Nobody wants to confront their problems in that kind of way. It just seems so tedious! So I put it off…and put it off…again and again. And just play guitar…or go to the gym instead…and continue to wallow about being depressed and anxious…and without knowing what to do about it. Also…the fear that the book won’t help..but that’s no attitude to have…



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