painful. like a spiritual ascetic practice!
channelled gods and demons. hocked the house.
but finally wrote the truth. pray it’s not mawkish but truth usually is, but at least it’s mine and so i love it the way i lvoe elephants.
it’s always worth it, changes the entire nature of the day, even if done for just a few moments. but better if 15 minutes and not thinking about the water boiling for the coffee.
i heard these people had vowed not to buy anything unnecessary for an entire year and it seemed like a good idea. most of us have bags and boxes of crap that don’t need to be replicated. that’s just the way we are. it was worth it. it wasn’t exciting. didn’t feel deprived. felt worthy and mature like a spinster ascetic.
two seconds ago, i allowed my anger to get the best of me, in responding on this site to an english teacher’s semi racist remarks, regarding a young girl’s choice of words in expressing herself. i could not undo those words, but my regret left me with a lesson. this teacher’s interpretation of how one this girl should express herself was NOT the point. this teacher did not recogize her own power—the power to choose between encouraging a child who was reaching out for help or the power to crush her with a scolding about the proper usage of words. i, in turn used my words weakly, making the choice to speak from rage instead of enlightment. this may be a virtual world, but there are real people involved and i vow to treasure my freedom of expression and the opportunity to choose to speak with consideration.
1.my beautiful girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!& what they’re doing in the world
2. the earth and a bird named zack
3. the sun and heavens
4. the ancestors (some of them)
5. spirit, heart, mind, body, etc.
6. home, food, clean water
7. i love ny & other wretched shows
8. doug ruhe and the way he saves the world 1 by 1
9. unearned grace
10. the freedom to move any way to any song i choose
they usually ARE! but even when you want to “drink warm gin out of the cat’s bowl” (to paraphrase ann lamott) or get hysterical about your pain, frustration, leaking roof, unpaid bills, broken tooth, problems with THEY KNOW WHO THEY ARE, etc. well i forget how that sentence was going to end, but i think happily, something about faith over fear and a note to self to be less frantic. (frantic is such a pretty little word for the truth of it—see paranoid&obsessiveauthors.com.) JK
beyond acts of nature, there was so much harm done and injustices that occured and dignity that was stripped from those who had already lost so much so quickly…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DlOoCFAYx30
and there is so much we can still do to right the wrongs…keep your eyes open.
