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I'm doing 28 things
 

...........'s Life List

  1. 1. clean my room
    1 cheer
    2,666 people
  2. 2. diet
    1 entry . 1 cheer
    215 people
  3. 3. Lose 30 pounds
    1 entry . 1 cheer
    5,154 people
  4. 4. learn Squash
    6 people
  5. 5. clear up my skin
    2 entries . 3 cheers
    209 people
  6. 6. Beat my depression
    2 entries . 3 cheers
    1,684 people
  7. 7. Have a Peeling
    3 entries
    3 people
  8. 8. Prove them wrong
    1 entry . 4 cheers
    152 people
  9. 9. get a boyfriend
    9 entries . 2 cheers
    2,434 people
  10. 10. be loved
    1 entry . 2 cheers
    1,839 people
  11. 11. Make love.
    1 entry . 2 cheers
    1,336 people
  12. 12. give a strip tease
    2 people
  13. 13. go skinny dipping
    1 entry . 1 cheer
    3,072 people
  14. 14. Take more pictures
    4 cheers
    14,312 people
  15. 15. get my driver's license
    2 cheers
    5,029 people
  16. 16. Look Like I'm Happy
    2 cheers
    2 people
  17. 17. visit Amsterdam
    503 people
  18. 18. Go to England
    1 entry
    843 people
  19. 19. Read the Book of Mormon
    2 cheers
    114 people
  20. 20. have a son
    1 cheer
    186 people
  21. 21. be more patient
    2 entries . 3 cheers
    2,905 people
  22. 22. Be more polite
    41 people
  23. 23. be a marketing executive
    14 people
  24. 24. Have an awesomely different life by this time next year
    2 entries . 1 cheer
    127 people
  25. 25. be a size 5
    26 people
  26. 26. end my life
    1 cheer
    27 people
  27. 27. make the most of 2009
    1 entry
    11 people
  28. 28. learn bulgarian
    1 entry
    65 people

How I did it
How to make 2008 my year of SUCCESS, LOVE AND HAPPINESS!- No Excuses this time!
It took me
1 year
It made me
it was fine


Recent entries
make the most of 2009
January 2009: 9 months ago

I started this year with the worst luck. I lost all my reasons to exist in just 1 week of January.
I couldnt get out of bed because the depression I was experiencing was killing me. One day I was able to stand up and go and get a haircut, the next day I managed to apply for a job.
But soon the sorrow catched me again, and I spent 2 days without eating just laying in bed depressed. When I tried to get out of it, I fainted! Luckily my mother was there to pick me up and put me right into bed, then i was fed properly, but I must admit Im disgusted by food.
Im still in a training session and dont know if at the end Im gonna get the job or not, I guess in February we shall know.



learn bulgarian
I like it! 10 months ago

I was in a relationship with a bulgarian guy, and I lived there for 3months, he bought me a course for me to learn it, so now when im bored and study it just because I like it :)



Beat my depression (read all 2 entries…)
The pieces 10 months ago

One of my personal abusers stopped because i will find a job and will move out, so there wont be more ME in the scene and thats the whole purpose… to get rid of me. But I know that if I fail to get that job I wont be able to have a single day of peace in this house.

I still continue being abused no matter how hard I try to let person #2 ,know that is not cool, that if I ever did something to deserve it to please forgive me. But it wont stop, I know i made mistakes but today i regret them and Im not ashame of saying IM SORRY, and the answer is ”...OK..” (like whatever). I resign myself, listen the reasons of “why im not good enough, of how I ruin other peoples live, how im useless and incable of helping, how im selfish, and how Im NOT CONVENIENT”..

(Why am I not convenient? because Im not rich and cant guarantee you 5 cars, because I cant solve the big messed up problem you got yourself into, because my nationality doesnt suit you for your own selfish desires.)

Sadly, I apolgized for the “damages” and promised one day I will not be around.

Where will you go?
Somewhere
Haha are you saying you gonna suicide
No, I never said that word
STOP IT and speak clear
It means whatever it means to you

And went away because I had enough cruelty and was sunday.. I assumed the person would be very happy I dissapeared for the rest of the day.
Later on received an email from this person as usually trashing me, when the only thing I did was to listen all that crap ask forgiveness and guarantee that I will vanish.

How can I be hated so much?
My days can be counted.



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