It’s been almost 9 months since I’d left the only world I’d known behind. It happened so abruptly. After 5 long years, it was over. I think it’s safe to say I’m completely over it. I don’t lie in bed at night and cry, I don’t feel sick when I see the “new girlfriend.”
I wrote this in my journal two weeks ago “I’ve seen a million pictures of you since our breakup. And not a single one has made me sick to my stomach, or even remotely sad until today. I was going through my old photos and found one of you at the aquarium. Here lies a photo of a person I used to love very very much. And I thought to myself if only we had stayed the way we were in photos, a still frame in one of our few seconds of happiness. I don’t miss you. I don’t wish we could’ve worked things out. I just know I could’ve known the person in that photo forever, but they’re gone. That you, I won’t ever know again. And that’s what makes me sad.”
I mean sometimes I miss us, and the way we could be in a room with a thousand people and only see each other. But that doesn’t change that it’s over, that I’m happy that it’s over, or the fact that the remaining periods of the time were completely awful.
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R.I.P Pupa<3
4 months ago
I’ve always spelled Pupa wrong ever since I was little, and he used to tell me it was “Papa” but I wouldn’t believe him. Now that I’m older I just think the misspelling is part of our history that I’d never want to change. On to the tattoo.
I really love Kurt Halsey’s work, especially his doves. However, everyone seems to be getting them and I wanted my tattoo to have severe significance, so I changed it up slightly. My grandfather is being represented by the dove who is flying away, and I being the small one left behind. A broken heart is fitting because his passing nearly killed me. He was and still remains my favorite person in the entire world. And this tattoo, everytime I look at it, will remind me of how hard it was to lose him. It’s located on my left forearm.
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I buy a new fragrance all the time. Since I was around Seventeen I had indulged in the Britney Spears line, I’m kind of done with that now. I’m not big on pop star perfume lines anymore, however I am pretty partial to Hilary Duff’s “With Love”. I was in Sephora one day, smelling all the perfumes and I found one I fell in love with. It smells nice and sophisticated instead of overbearing and sweet. It’s “Danielle” by Danielle Steel. My name’s Danielle.. so what better signature scent?
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