dianeyh

It’s taken me, oh, about 6 months to get to week 8. I’ve been keeping up with my morning pages fairly consistently, sometimes skipping a day or two. It’s getting the weekly exercises done that delays me. But I enjoy the morning pages. The artist dates are a bit difficult for me, but I feel that I do take a lot of time for myself that I don’t think of as artist dates.

Well, I can’t exactly say I’ve finally decided on a single profession for the rest of my life, I have found the direction I want to take and recognized that it is a journey, not a destination.

Ever since graduating high school, I’ve been insatiably fascinated by metaphysical studies. It’s the one thing that stuck with me as I moved in and out of different interests and possible career directions, but I never had enough confidence to think that I could make a living in that field—until the last couple of years. It has become clear to me that no other field of work would be as satisfying for me. As I learn and grow as a energy healing practitioner, I will most likely fine-tune what I’m doing or take it in new directions, so five or ten years from now it may not look like what I expect, but it’ll be an exciting ride.

Frankly I have not been keeping this up very well. Some days I would remember to do it, some days I wouldn’t (but would usually realize later). One of the goals of this exercise is to practice responding to people with love rather than judgment, and I definitely am not there yet. Judgment or defensiveness is usually my first response, and then I send love when I realize I’m doing that. Not that I expect to change it in a few days, of course. Journaling about it here helps me keep up the practice, whereas normally I would lapse after a couple of weeks.

I picked a card out of my Doreen Virtue Archangel deck the other day, and asked what it is I need to know right now. The card I drew was called “Beloved”, and the description said something about how the more you send love out into the world, the more you receive in return. I thought, that’s what I’ve been practicing! I was mainly focused on experiencing more peace and love within myself rather than receiving more love, but there is that aspect, too.