dntBreakme

Thats all I want, and hopefully by writing everyday I will get to that inspiration and finally complete a piece of writing.

Im that girl who kind of stands off to the side, I avert my eyes when a cute guy approaches, I stumble over my words and lack the self confidence to approach any guy who is even slightly attractive. I stop myself from ever falling for a guy by telling myself that there is no way that he would ever fall for me, there is no happily ever after and why would this unbelievable attractive guy want me, when there are so many pretty, perky girls out there…

Even when a guy seemingly wants to be with me, i end up ruining it, by thinking too much and telling myself there is no way. No way that he’s gonna stick around when he gets to know me better, and when he starts to hear my secrets and when all my flaws become exposed..

I can honestly say that I dont know what love is, I dont know what it looks like and I doubt I will ever know what it is because I am my own worst enemy. I give up without trying and I bring myself down.

Anyways, im slowly working on this goal to finally get the guy. And to not overthink it. I want to get lost in romance and finally experience that all consuming feeling of having someone love you back. .

I want to stop fighting myself, and just lose myself.

I have tried and failed. This will be my fourth attempt to learn and this time I will not become frustrated(hopefully), and not give up