doberla18

I recently edited this goal because I realized going from 0 days of working out to 5 was a little overwhelming. Now my goal is to do at least 3 days a week. Once I conquer that on a consistent basis, then we’ll move to 5 days!

Well after reviewing my list – I’ve realized that not only do I allow my issues to define me, I define myself through my issues! I’ve been on a diet for 15 years, I have terrible boundaries with those that I love, I buy all the fitness magazines, read them, cut out the articles I like and then don’t go to the gym – which creates 2 issues, spending money unnecessarily and sitting on the couch instead of getting out and being active!

All I can say is that at least I’ve identified some of these and I am committed to working on them. Yes I’ve lost weight and have been paying off my debt these last few months…yes I’ve been working hard at work and tried to stay organized. But still – I can’t help but remember this one quote from Ally McBeal: “Even if I get past my problems I’m just going to go out and get new ones!”

Maybe I’m afraid of the “new ones.” Maybe the largest obstacle to getting over my issues is not the work involved getting there, but rather what can happen afterwards…that unknown…where it leads…what doors it opens…and perhaps more importantly…the doors that it will close…

I’m excited, almost half way to go. Yes, it’s taken some time and there were set backs, but all that matters is today I am 9.5 pounds lighter than when I originally started this goal. My specific goal was to lose 20 pounds before September 1st. Since I have 10.5 more to go, I need to amend that to 20 pounds before October 1st. I just started swimming again and if I can swim 2-3 days a week, do pilates and yoga a few days a week, I’m confident I can reach my goal by October 1st, hopefully sooner!