ebinsd




I'm doing 10 things
 

How I did it
How to move back to San Diego
It took me
5 years
It made me
surprised


Recent entries
find a relationship.
Well the unthinkable finally happened . . . 11 months ago

and I finally found a relationship.

Word to the wise, don’t just settle when you find a pretty face willing to actually be with you. Some of the prettiest faces hide the ugliest hearts.

When someone tells you they are damaged and will hurt you, believe them. People typically only lie about their finer points.

If your competing with drugs, you’ve already lost.

If you attempt a threesome at their behest, and they start on the third party in another room without even thinking to call you to join in, run don’t walk. They do not love you.

If they talk more about their ex than they do you, without you inquiring, they are not over them and you will not be the one to change this.

Empty eyes speak louder than any words.

If you ask someone why they finally caved and settled into a relationship with you and their response is, “Because I knew it was what you really wanted.” Run! This is not the right answer.

When you fight and you keep trying to be patient and calm and use logic and their only response is to not listen, scream and basically go “La la la la not listening” the whole time you are trying to work things out, learn early on some things can’t be worked out. And if the only success in the argument is them pushing buttons until you finally lose your cool as well, this is also not good.

If it starts to feel incomparably wrong, it usually is.

Anyone who puts friends they themselves describe as flaky before you, they are a flake as well and aren’t mature enough to give you the real deal.

If they can’t say I love you several months in, they probably never will.

If something better comes along, put down that martyr’s cross and take it. You may not get a second chance and the unhappiness will only worsen if you stay, running the high risk of ruining you for others after the fact.

Avoid people you know for a fact love game playing and button pushing, again, you more than likely will not be the one to break them.

When said person’s own friends tell you they can deal with that person as a friend but would never want to deal with them in a relationship, listen! They have known them longer.

An overdose and getting committed at two different times is typically not a good sign. Especially if the drugs remain in the picture. No matter how often they whimsically say they are sick of the drugs or should go back to NA meetings, if they don’t even after you offer several times to go with them, they probably never will.

If they are a bad kisser AND terrible in bed, both foreplay and during, no amount of what you think is love is going to change that. If everything else is equally bad, get out! Do not look back. You’re not losing anything.

If the relationship comes to an end, but you remain friends yet nothing changed aside from the title, you are not friends and you never will be.

If you remain friends and they still constantly disrespect you—why the hell are you still putting up with the same shit?? Seriously, you don’t even carry the title you thought meant you had to work through things and put up with the bullshit anymore. If a friend or potential friend you hadn’t slept with and had no desire to talked to you that way, you wouldn’t stick around. This is no different.

If you are dating and you’re instant messaging your lover and they accidentally send flirtatious IMs to you several times thinking you are someone else, this is not a good sign. And following it up later by saying they just want to be alone for a night but they are going to throw on Enigma and think of you does not make it OK.



Have a Traditional Festive Christmas (read all 2 entries…)
it is finished 2 years ago

now comes all the cleanup. we did christmas eve at my aunt’s and there were presents and reltives and decortions nd i brought a couple friends who didn’t have their own family affairs to cater to. we had great time. my car died christms eve night and christmas we had a small dinner with my aunt and uncle and grandmother. i am so not looking forwrd to taking down my midget christmas tree. i’m almost tempted to just strt trend where christmas trees stay up year round.



Have a Traditional Festive Christmas (read all 2 entries…)
so it begins 2 years ago

well i spent half the morning trying to hunt down my christmas tree since it’s been years since we have actually bothered with it. (for those of you wondering we do use an artificial tree, habit after years of living in the projects where real trees were not permitted.) after a trip to storage and then retearing apart three different closets i finally found it. charlie brown christmas tree is not word enough to describe this poor tree, but i did spend the afternoon making it look as close to a real tree as possible and i must say i didn’t do all too shabbily. i also put out the nativity (though i am far from religious) some garland and a few other decorative touches. i still have more lights and garland to put up but heaven forbid there be any scotch tape in the house this time of year. that’s it so far and this year is financially bleak so i am not sure how much more i can do other than the traditional yearly dinner at one of the aunt’s houses. but i will keep you posted.




 

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