Awaywiththefairies

it's all Buddha.



I'm doing 15 things
 

How I did it
How to give to charity
It took me
100 days
It made me
good


How to stop smoking weed
It took me
6 months
It made me
Happy


How to read the Bible
It took me
30 days
It made me
so-so


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Recent entries
Three happy things (read all 2 entries…)
Untitled

Coffee and cake with all girls together
Made it to the gym
Having some wine



Daily, consciously choose happiness (read all 5 entries…)
Missing something?

I feel like I’m constantly chasing happiness but never quite reach it. I read self help books, listen to talks, envelop myself within the ideology of Buddhism but still feel like I’m missing something truly fundamental. My life has all the right ingredients for likehappiness but I feel like I’m not getting the results.
A few weeks ago I went back on anti depressants as I felt I was about to embark on a nervous breakdown.But now, I feel like I’m just existing. I’m neither happy nor unhappy I’m just here and have no emotion. I know the logical thing is to carry on til I finish college but I’m not enjoying the nothingness. When I was off them, I had bad days where I felt cap but I also had days when I felt I could literally do anything and it would be wonderful and everyone was perfect. I miss those days.



Love myself by eliminating any negative thoughts that arise and replacing with a positive (read all 16 entries…)
The Power

I’m reading The Power by Rhonda Byrne for a second time. I enjoyed it so much the first time round and it’s been a while since I first read it. I feel that negativity has so much to answer for in the world. If I make the effort to feel love for people and things in my life, everything has a magical feel to it and nothing bad can come out of it. I feel like I can take on the world and no one can get in my way. Sometimes its difficult to drag that happiness out from within because it’s so well hidden but it’s worth making the effort for.



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