emmalicious




I'm doing 39 things
 

emmalicious's Life List

  1. 1. give something back
    16 people
  2. 2. be kissed in the rain.
    1 cheer
    783 people
  3. 3. Watch all of the Dawson's Creek Episodes
    1,239 people
  4. 4. save myself for marriage
    56 people
  5. 5. have 4-6 kids
    2 people
  6. 6. get married!
    17,896 people
  7. 7. stop biting my nails
    6,907 people
  8. 8. meet Josh Groban
    54 people
  9. 9. be the best pediatric nurse EVER
    1 person
  10. 10. Michael Buble
    1 person
  11. 11. always live for Christ!
    1 person
  12. 12. lead someone to the Lord
    6 people
  13. 13. meet Oprah
    245 people
  14. 14. sing the ABC's backwards
    2 people
  15. 15. go to every Disney park
    2 people
  16. 16. go parasailing
    685 people
  17. 17. be bold
    91 people
  18. 18. take more risks
    996 people
  19. 19. meet Zac Hanson
    1 person
  20. 20. fall in love
    23,800 people
  21. 21. learn to play the piano
    7,146 people
  22. 22. have a house with a room dedicated to Elvis Presley
    1 person
  23. 23. Send a message in a bottle
    3,526 people
  24. 24. fly (like a superhero)
    1 person
  25. 25. go on a road trip with no predetermined destination
    18,118 people
  26. 26. Be granted the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and to have the wisdom to know the difference...
    467 people
  27. 27. save someone's life
    965 people
  28. 28. Send a postcard to Postsecret
    2,769 people
  29. 29. eat an entire bag of oreos...and not feel guilty!
    1 person
  30. 30. be in a movie
    1,476 people
  31. 31. read the entire Bible
    2,382 people
  32. 32. own a pair of pumps...and wear them!
    1 person
  33. 33. do a real cartwheel
    1 person
  34. 34. visit Seattle
    233 people
  35. 35. lose the weight!!
    31 people
  36. 36. dance in a thunderstorm
    1 cheer
    7 people
  37. 37. read through the Harry Potter series every year
    2 cheers
    1 person
  38. 38. travel the world
    1 cheer
    17,824 people
  39. 39. apply to be on "The Real World"
    1 cheer
    1 person
Recent entries
forgive myself
Untitled 2 years ago

A few days after my senior prom last May, I started dating my prom date. He was a junior and one of my best friend’s brothers. It started out fine, and I was super happy. I got my first kiss from him (not the greatest experience…it was the day after we started dating, and it was at school. Very unromantic.), and about a month later I made out for the first time. May sound awkward, but I enjoyed making out. I’m not going to have sex until I’m married, so that was never an issue. However, about a month and a half in we were making out for like, ever. We didn’t have sex, we didn’t even come close to it (or any version of sex), but it was just inappropriate and I didn’t really realize it at the time. I was just too caught up in the moment. The next day we both went to camps for a week. A week later, he broke up with me, mostly because he “can’t see himself ever actually loving me.” Nice. Now, I got over him really quickly. Like, the next day (no joke). I was so happy that I wasn’t with him anymore, and I think that the reason I thought I liked him when we were dating was because he was my first real, “high school,” boyfriend. So that didn’t matter. But I started to really regret that one night a couple of weeks later. It’s really bothered me on and off throughout this year. I go through periods when the me then just disgusts me. I love me now, and at the time I loved me then, but looking back, I can’t stand who I was. Usually I’m okay with it. I mean, I know that God has forgiven me for letting it get slightly out of hand, and I thought I forgave myself, but I don’t think I completely have. Because I still don’t like who I was. I still gag when I think about the fact that I dated him. I regret it. I regret that night. I regret dating him period. I even partially regret prom, which was so much fun. And I can’t stand regret. It is not something that I like to feel. So I just need to get over what happened completely, and forgive myself.



Perform in a musical
Untitled 2 years ago

I was in several in High School. Even though they weren’t professional productions, it was such an amazing experience! I was a chorus member in “Once Upon a Mattress,” a small part in “Oklahoma!” and Mrs. Potts in “Beauty and the Beast.” So much fun!!




 

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