I'm doing 22 things
CFS
18 months ago
I’m trying to get better, and my doctor said a regular sleep pattern will help. We’ll see. One week in and I’m feeling worse than before.
ferretwho's Life List
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1. learn to bellydance
1 entry561 people -
2. find out what my blood type is
1,317 people -
3. learn guitar
3,063 people -
4. Go to Iceland
522 people -
5. stop being so nice
1 entry35 people -
6. stop trying to be perfect
1 entry30 people -
7. Be more green
273 people -
8. see Bill Bailey live
14 people -
9. have a regular sleep pattern
1 entry35 people -
10. drink more water
18,966 people -
11. go to Africa
1,565 people -
12. write a novel
9,674 people -
13. get published in an academic journal
36 people -
14. go in a helicopter
9 people -
15. sing in a band
1 entry707 people -
16. become a copy-editor
4 people -
17. learn to play the flute
332 people -
18. get a decent degree
2 people -
19. recover from CFS
4 people -
20. get involved with feminist activism
1 person -
21. find love
1,945 people -
22. read 50 books in 2008
194 people
Recent entries
An explanation
19 months ago
My doctor actually told me to do this, and I think I need to. I won’t do something if I don’t think I can do it perfectly. I have to force myself to do essays because I’m convinced they won’t be good enough. I won’t blog in case it’s not good enough. I don’t even suggest things amongst my friends very often because I’m convinced it won’t be good enough.
Well, it’s got to stop. It’s okay to do things badly sometimes. Tonight, I’m trying my best to force myself to sing in public with a friend because I know I’m trying to talk myself out of it because I’m scared I’ll mess up. It doesn’t matter if I mess up. It won’t be the end of the world. It’s just a stupid acoustic night.
The reason:
19 months ago
People tend to take advantage of my niceness. I can’t imagine how on earth I could stop this, but I need to because I can’t afford it and it brings me down.
I don’t want to stop being nice. Not completely. But I don’t know when to draw the line or how to cut off the friends to whom I’ve been too nice until this point. Though I know that if they don’t want me if I don’t give them things or if I say no once in a while they’re not worth it, it’s more complicated than that.
Any advice would be great.
