fixemallup

still not happy…working on it…why is it when you want something it just sometimes seems out of reach. started realizing that yes i am part of the problem (duh)...just when im getting a little ahead i just freak out. i know what i want and its right there…why the hell am i so afraid? there is nothing o be scared of…..i keep telling myself that and in my heart i know its true. why do i feel so responsible for everyone else’s happiness…..is it selfish to make myself happy? i know the kids are happy if i am….why am i so scared to just allow myself happiness?

want to laugh out loud at the little things just because

i am tired of being miserable…of making the wrong choices…of settling because i put myself into shit situations…i want to put me and my kids first..