incognito81

after two years of being in love with someone that most people would call abusive…after two years of being told my job wasn’t good enough because i wanted to be a nurse, he went and got engaged to an air hostess. that did it. that really puts it in perspective. it isn’t my job. it really wasn’t my job. he just didn’t love me at all, and he used every excuse, to get out of it and get away from me possible. on the bright side i’m over being with him. on the down side i feel worthless like i’ll never be worth anything to anyone.

almost seems like it’d have been easier if it were just my job, you know?

i’ve been taking sleeping pills to go to sleep, and after a few days of sleeping at the same time every night, hopefully i should be able to let go of the pills and live a normal life with a normal schedule after that…

i love him. i get sick of waiting for him, but i seriously love him. i don’t think we’ll ever end up being together, and if we do, it’ll be a really rocky unstable ride. i don’t want to be heartbroken for freaking ever.

dunno what to do…