ir_krys

Since I can remember, my closest friends have been mostly guys…in my experience they seem to be easier to talk to, easier to trust, funnier, less emotional, and less petty. As a result, I was and continue to be the object of hatred by many a psycho girlfriend or stalker-groupie.

I’m not slutting around, hungering for guys’ attention…I’m too busy with school and life in general to go around stealing other women’s men…that’s not me at all. That’s gross and I can’t stand girls who do that.

I’m far from being one of those women who simply hates other women for no reason (or because of ‘mother-issues’).
I’m simply more comfortable around men because I don’t feel like I’m being disected, analyzed, or judged.

In spite of the fact that I’m the youngest of three girls, I never fully learned how to deal with females on the level of friendship. It may be sad but it’s true.
For now I simply keep at a safe distance because I don’t even know where to begin.

you know…in a crowded elevator…on the phone…at a restauraunt…in the car…

personally, i enjoy the silence, but I’m aware that most people don’t, and this results in a sort of ‘tension’ in the air. this tension is what makes it awkward…it drives me nuts.

even worse is the futile attempt of individuals to kill the silence by humming, whistling, faux-coughing, throat-clearing, repeating their last statement, and random, meaningless, totally incorrect ways of starting new sentences.(so…yeah…umm…and…ahh…)

my goal is to deal with this situation without getting irritated; keeping in mind the fact that not everyone is accustomed to silence, and not everyone is used to NOT talking.

I don’t know if it means I’m growing up or getting sick of useless crap but the mere sight of physical clutter aggrivates my anxiety. Recent experiences have taught me that a few material things are necessary for survival but they become a burden in excess.