janai_x3

I’d love to date a japanese guy, but where I am at, there aren’t even many asians around here that are my age. They are either too old or too young. THEY ARE SO HOT THOUGH. Most of them already have girlfriends >w< But I hope to find my chance to date one hopefully in my lifetime….

Well I am very shy.I actually took a quiz and was found to be 76% shy. In my past I was teased as a young child and my stepmother was cruel to me when I was a young child. (examples: she wouldn’t feed me, cut off my hair, etc) I haven’t talked to my dad in over 7 years and I don’t have much family except my mom and my two siblings. Basically my other realtives abandoned my intermediate family and I don’t think many people will understand me. Even before I was teased I was always shy, so it is kinda a personality and nature for me. I really do want to talk to people,but the problem is I am so shy, I try to avoid any contact with other people, except my family. And the chances I can actually talk to people I am very ignorant, for instance I have a angry tone in my voice and my temper just flares. I really don’t mean to act that way, but it seems everytime I am not at home I am so tense and blank. I am even careful about things I say on the internet, because I think people are judging me. (I literally edited this thing over 3 times) So how can I overcome my shyness? I don’t need to see a therapist about my past, because I have seen one before, but I am not sure I am quite over it, could that be affecting my “social status” or whatever? Furthermore I should add I have a really dislike for the place I live at. Mostly everyone here are all kinda immature and are into things teens nowadays are into (boys, cliques, cellphones, etc) and I feel like an outcast looking through a stained glass. (I am turning 15 and mature) I have really considered moving might help me overome my shyness, but I am not sure….Oh and I should add one more thing. I also do not at most times talk to boys because the first guy I ever went out with strangled me and the other guy I knew was trying to choose me between his ex. I don’t think I have much luck talking to boys… Sorry for it being so long, BUT HELP ME! x]