Contemplative Jenn

is beginning again



I'm doing 32 things
 

Contemplative Jenn's Life List

  1. 1. live with passion
    1 entry . 44 cheers
    122 people
  2. 2. live my one wild and precious life
    6 entries . 91 cheers
    7 people
  3. 3. Live my life with arms wide open
    3 entries . 65 cheers
    5 people
  4. 4. share my writing
    5 entries . 48 cheers
    8 people
  5. 5. stop stress eating
    2 entries . 36 cheers
    19 people
  6. 6. spend more quality time with my children
    9 entries . 31 cheers
    30 people
  7. 7. Make a difference
    2 entries . 14 cheers
    7,169 people
  8. 8. be honest with myself and others
    2 entries . 25 cheers
    33 people
  9. 9. get back to poetry
    3 entries . 23 cheers
    1 person
  10. 10. reflect on things for which I'm grateful
    26 entries . 13 cheers
    11 people
  11. 11. sweat
    1 entry . 6 cheers
    3 people
  12. 12. capture my moments
    2 entries . 3 cheers
    1 person
  13. 13. Be present, be here
    8 entries . 5 cheers
    1 person
  14. 14. come clean
    4 cheers
    5 people
  15. 15. Be a better parent
    2 entries . 6 cheers
    369 people
  16. 16. Celebrate my children
    5 entries . 14 cheers
    1 person
  17. 17. kick butt
    3 entries . 18 cheers
    6 people
  18. 18. Get my butt off this chair and do something physical
    1 entry . 24 cheers
    2 people
  19. 19. the Sisterhood of the Brazen Hussy
    1 entry . 12 cheers
    1 person
  20. 20. do naughty things
    2 team members . 3 entries . 17 cheers
    61 people
  21. 21. Get some other things back in check
    3 entries . 10 cheers
    1 person
  22. 22. take action
    6 entries . 12 cheers
    37 people
  23. 23. Fund micro-loans through Kiva.org
    3 entries . 15 cheers
    4 people
  24. 24. get a divorce
    4 cheers
    265 people
  25. 25. begin again
    1 entry . 6 cheers
    4 people
  26. 26. untangle
    5 cheers
    1 person
  27. 27. Embrace what is, but do not settle
    5 cheers
    1 person
  28. 28. re-gain a sense of joy and wonder
    10 cheers
    1 person
  29. 29. let it go
    1 entry . 3 cheers
    101 people
  30. 30. Create new writing
    7 cheers
    1 person
  31. 31. Finish pieces and send them out
    8 cheers
    1 person
  32. 32. embrace my bisexuality
    5 cheers
    11 people

How I did it
How to find a new place to live
It took me
90 days
It made me
optimistic


How to walk at least three times a week
It took me
2 years
It made me
energetic


Recent entries
take action (read all 6 entries…)
Signed, sealed, and soon-to-be delivered

Saturday I signed the lease for the condo I’ll be moving into in a couple of weeks. The owner and I had coffee and exchanged ideas on parenting, parents, and life. We signed our copies and shared a hug before we parted. This is going to be good.

Tonight I reserved a 17’ rental truck for the Saturday of Memorial Day weekend. I get the keys to the condo next Wednesday, but will take it slow, move a carload at a time, set up housekeeping, take some measurements, order mattresses and furniture for the kids’ rooms. I’ll retreat to that space when I need to, a much-needed safety valve, escape, given the tenor of my current “home.” My siblings will help me move the big items on the 25th, 5 days shy of my 20th wedding anniversary. Kind of poetic, bitter and sweet. But this IS going to be good, isn’t it? There is no way it cannot be.



begin again
I didn't settle, I settee'd

I bought myself a settee, for my new boudoir, from a writer, on craigslist. Chartreuse velvet, tufted, which literally and figuratively supported one’s creative process. We agreed that is was meant for me.

She had written a play about her mother on that demure sofa, in the late nights keeping watch over the winding down to rest of the one who gave her life, the most difficult and the most important person in her world. Her story echoed mine, and her presence in that soon-to-be-empty house inspired and encouraged… there is life ahead, shining brightly, for each of us. That small transaction solidified a connection with a kindred traveler for some small part, at least, of the impending journey.

It cost me $75, a 90 minute drive, and a little heavy lifting. I returned with something distinctive, just for me, one small element of my new life’s vision. And I gained a hug, a new friend, and a gorgeous artifact of another’s creative process, a chartreuse ray of hope for my own. The way I see it, that is a bargain, by any measure.



find a new place to live
Down at the end of Darling Street...

Yesterday I went to view a 3 bedroom condo on Darling Street. It wasn’t exactly darling. For $1300/month it should at least be… cute? ;-)

That’s alright, because I don’t think I could give my address with a straight face. I don’t aspire to quaint. I am not “darling.” Daring, perhaps. Definitely.

I’m looking for a place where my children can feel at home, secure, with natural light and some room to move around, to be. I will find it, it will just take time.

It’s been over two decades since I shopped rentals. It’s also been over 20 years since I’ve “dated.” I have a feeling the two have this in common… by experiencing what we don’t want, we learn what we do.

The search continues….



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