lateblossom

Wash my face clean of oil and put on only lotion, sunscreen and eye liner. Alternating from hot to cold water helps. Do not use acne or pimple disappearing formulas. It only works for a first few days. I heard it only makes your skin unhealthy.

Looking back, I always felt like a burden to my family. Didn’t felt appreciated. My parents separated when I was 4. I lived with my aunt ‘dad’s sister’ family. I was burden to them obviously. Then my dad remarried. I was a burden to my new mom too and her kids. I remember I was always so quiet and tried to do things by myself so that I won’t be such a nuisance to them. But there was always somehting I did wrong. Thought everything was my fault. My new mom was so verbally hurtful. This led to such anger thru my adolescence. I became antisocial. I believed i was bothering everyone. Then, I began to hate my parents, hating everyone else too. Ofcourse I can’t blame this totally on my parents. There were my choices involved too, even though its hard to admit. As a child, I always wondered why they had me. Whatever, I don’t want to care about the past anymore. The Lord brought me into this world for a reason and it is not only because my parents just felt like having a child. And I know I am going to miss them a lOt when they are gone even though I am mad at them right now. I am going to learn to appreciate them because I know I would regret it later. The past is nothing but memories really. Maybe I was just too sensitive. But honestly, my parents give me fear of getting married. I’m going to hope for the best and only the best.

Patience requires more than refraining from retaliation. It is not just trying to be calm and hold everything in. I did this and now I just wished I just let everything out right at the moment so that I got it off my chest. I realized I been doing things all wrong. The secret to being patient is to look at every situation or person in the best light possible. I really need God’s help on this because my mind is programmed to be pessimistic. It’s hard to think in a positive way when people try to bring me down. But I really want to acheive this goal because it will bring me peace to my heart whatever trials I face. I guess I have to sacrifice myself.