lcarney




I'm doing 42 things
 

lcarney's Life List

  1. 1. knit a sweater
    2 cheers
    772 people
  2. 2. be true to myself
    423 people
  3. 3. Work smarter
    67 people
  4. 4. become a therapist
    77 people
  5. 5. get a master's degree
    2,976 people
  6. 6. spend more time with cute animals
    1 person
  7. 7. spend more time with children
    8 people
  8. 8. stop worrying
    2,016 people
  9. 9. become a successful journalist
    13 people
  10. 10. meet Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.
    1 person
  11. 11. accept my father's death
    1 cheer
    11 people
  12. 12. help people to heal
    1 cheer
    1 person
  13. 13. team up with other New Yorkers to help develop 43 Places's New York City Locals' page
    1 cheer
    2 people
  14. 14. find out what's wrong with my stomach
    1 cheer
    1 person
  15. 15. get a new job that I love
    1 cheer
    69 people
  16. 16. draw more
    1 cheer
    2,158 people
  17. 17. understand God
    1 cheer
    23 people
  18. 18. get off my anti-depressant
    1 entry . 3 cheers
    3 people
  19. 19. live somewhere less expensive
    1 cheer
    1 person
  20. 20. read as many books as possible, starting with all the books I own but haven't read
    1 cheer
    613 people
  21. 21. get over a broken heart
    1 entry
    297 people
  22. 22. meet some new people
    20 people
  23. 23. Publish a novel
    1 cheer
    952 people
  24. 24. learn guitar
    3,060 people
  25. 25. lose 15 pounds
    3,167 people
  26. 26. Join a 43 Things club for blondes!
    10 people
  27. 27. drink more water daily
    1 entry . 1 cheer
    145 people
  28. 28. learn to relax
    1 entry . 1 cheer
    603 people
  29. 29. write more poetry
    1 cheer
    912 people
  30. 30. make more friends
    1 entry . 1 cheer
    5,077 people
  31. 31. get published in The New Yorker
    56 people
  32. 32. feel passion again
    3 people
  33. 33. face my fears
    259 people
  34. 34. Fall in love
    24,436 people
  35. 35. get a job
    10,507 people
  36. 36. make money fast
    69 people
  37. 37. help people more
    1 entry
    24 people
  38. 38. stop taking myself so seriously
    26 people
  39. 39. start a movement
    123 people
  40. 40. play poker
    103 people
  41. 41. have better posture
    7,719 people
  42. 42. Get a tattoo
    1 entry
    20,232 people
Recent entries
stop being late
how i did it 3 years ago

This has been a lifelong problem for me, and it’s only been recently that I’ve realized that it ruins the respect people might have for me. When I was younger (I’m 28 now) I used lateness as a way to not have to do things I didn’t want to do (i.e. stand at a busstop next to a major, busy street, see my father twice a week after my parents divorced, go to a babysitter’s house who I didn’t like). I would do other passive aggressive things, too, like pretend to be sick if I didn’t have something finished for school, or accidentally forget my house keys everyday.

My mother had me in therapy for seven years to try and fix the problem, and even that didn’t work.

One day this year I was rushing around to get somewhere, as usual, making sure I looked perfect, anxious about what people would make of me when I got where I was going … the anxiety about going to a new place or going to a job I don’t like really do me in when I’m getting ready, combined with trying to make myself look perfect. Then, I put on these heels that always hurt my feet, but I thought they would make me look better, and on my way down the stairs, I fell.

That job was just a temp job, but once it ended, my foot was in so much pain that I just lay around and got apathetic. I was already living off unemployment from being fired from a very important job earlier that year. Anytime I’ve been fired, it’s been due to lateness. So I just stayed at home a lot for a while and let my broken toe heal. I live in New York, so I couldn’t drive anywhere. It was the summer, so I couldn’t wear any cute sandals. It took a few months for my toe to heal, and it still has not gone back to looking the way it used to.

So now, when I am in the shower getting ready to go somewhere, I look down at that toe and I remember, and I think to myself, “No, never again. Just take it easy and don’t rush around.” It forces me to plan my mundane activities more, which I think is one of the major issues (besides the passive agression). It sucks to have to plan out boring stuff, but it’s much better than rushing so much that you hurt yourself.



get over a broken heart
Untitled 3 years ago

My heart has been broken for a long time. My boyfriend just ended our relationship on Friday, but I never know if it’s really ending or not … we’ve broken up so many times.

I’m avoiding seeing him so we don’t get back together again, just for the sake of my sanity. It hurts, but the back and forth game hurts more.



help people more
what it's all about? 3 years ago

right?



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