I need to start making people earn my trust instead of just opening up too early. I’ve been screwed over and stabbed in the back too many times and never learned my lesson but it stops now.
lessthanthree13's Life List
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1. lose 50 pounds
1 entry . 1 cheer2,422 people -
2. eat healthier
1 cheer9,756 people -
3. get rid of anxiety
1 cheer35 people -
4. crochet a blanket
123 people -
5. run a mile
1 cheer245 people -
6. get a degree
1,021 people -
7. be a mommy
1 cheer112 people -
8. get a toyger or bengal kitten
1 person -
9. save $1000
1 cheer450 people -
10. go to Italy
1 cheer2,372 people -
11. golf under 100
3 people -
12. catch a Ryan Howard home run
1 person -
13. watch the Eagles win a Super Bowl
1 cheer4 people -
14. go on a cruise
3,904 people -
15. be like my dad
7 people -
16. be a size 8
186 people -
17. Send a postcard to Postsecret
2,769 people -
18. get out of debt
10,553 people -
19. visit alaska
2 cheers677 people -
20. feel sexy
147 people -
21. fit in THOSE jeans
1 person -
22. maintain a healthy weight
78 people -
23. hold a baby tiger
13 people -
24. Skydive
9,867 people -
25. wake up
120 people -
26. BE
197 people -
27. detox
337 people -
28. read all of Paulo Coelho's books
4 people -
29. be a size 12
59 people -
30. be a size 10
97 people -
31. get pregnant
874 people -
32. protect the kids
1 person -
33. give away 50 books on BookMooch.com
1 person -
34. own my own car
54 people -
35. Win the lottery
3,673 people -
36. send the kids to college
2 people -
37. have a 4.0 gpa
72 people -
38. get a colonic
27 people -
39. visit Oia
1 person -
40. get another stamp in my passport
26 people -
41. take a family vacation to Turtle Bay Resort
1 person
This weekend we went to see his old band play. I actually teared up in front of my boyfriend during “our song.” It was the first time I’d stayed in the room while they played it in the past 3 years. It hit me all of a sudden that the memories were there, but I had something way better than I ever had with AD sitting right next to me, holding my hand and understanding without jealousy why I got choked up. I realized that by facing the memories and staring them down, when I turned around to walk away, they didn’t follow me.
I saw his picture the next day and there was nothing there. Not sadness, not anger, not hurt, nothing. It’s like I don’t even know him, or want to. He just doesn’t exist in my life anymore, and I’m happier for it.
I’m starting this goal at 185. My long term goal is 50, although I think I’d like to be at about 120, in all honesty. I guess we’ll see how it goes and decide when I get to 135.
Thank god for fitday.com because seeing exactly what I’m eating and watching that little orange section jump up at fat is REALLY making me accountable for my food decisions.
