invisiblekiss

I always do this, espescially those more successful and prettier than I am. Makes my self esteem and all go downnnnnnnnnn :( :(

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Thing is I know I have so much freedom just to CHOOSE what I want to do where I want to go, sometimes i just dont know and feel stunned liek what the hell do i want to do with myself. I am moving in with my girlfriend in Minnesota, after or before she starts basic training for the army, which is next summer.. now what do you think is best? moving before she starts of after.. what will i do for 9 weeks alone in an apartment lol!? but anyway.. im getting a job sometime this month for sure, it cant linger forever and i neeeeed money. iw ant a simple job. i live in maryland, mostly stupid jobs, but i dont want a big job because im not mvoed out yet. i am not looking to settle here, right now, just a temporary thing to save up money and because i NEED a job and yeah.. but whats a simple job??
i got a lot of offers through email but they arent close by my house, some i dont even know where in amryland they are located. i dont know which direction to take with this job thing: get a job by my area that i can walk to and is a little low paying jsut a part time job like bookstore or something, or post back to those places online that pay like 10-15 dollars an hour doing a little more skilled work but i dont know where theyre located. and some are accessible, but it takes practice and time knowing how to get there. its jsut theres lots of opportunity, and i still am putting off filling out the stack of applciations i recieved. i need a way to trick my mind into filling them out so ill actually FILL THE GIOD DMN THINGS OUT!! !

and then with living on y own,w ith my gf. i jsut gotta plan what im gonna do, ya know… like reality sets in and im goign to finally move out next year.. she has her life pout together for the whole, i dont. jsut some vague ideas and goals and hoeps, but i need to look at the hard reality, come bills and things.. so whats your advice on this and actually living. not jsut setting up to live on your own and settling down, but where your life goas, she asked what im gonna do during the 9 weeks shes at basic i said i dont know, probably work a lot, or at least get some money. like what the hell>? that answer is a bullshti answer youd give your mom! not your girlfriedn! so what the hell!!! help me.