I'm doing 3 things
So I like to do a lot of emotional work in the mornings, sometimes listening to music and sometimes in silence because my thoughts refuse to surface. Sometimes they don’t surface anyways, and it’s the most annoying sort of her-name-is-on-the-tip-of-my-tongue feeling and I can’t get it out. But yesterday I realized that my two goals are completely tied to one another. If I let go of the guilt, I will have overcome my social anxiety. The guilt is what makes me feel like a bad person, someone who should hide, someone who is ashamed, sorry, embarrassed, not worthy of having friends. No one out there who I want to be friends with would ever think that of me, so I need to stop thinking it of myself. No one is perfect. The past is passed. My future is bright.
luna21's Life List
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1. Overcome my social anxiety
2 entries . 1 cheer141 people -
2. Let go of guilt
59 people -
3. Lose 15 lbs
565 people
How I did it: I used Jean Chatzky's advice after seeing her on the Martha Stewart show. She laid out a percentage of how much you should be spending on each category -- Home, Transportation, etc -- and, although I was spending more than she recommended in one area, I trimmed down the others to make ends meet accordingly. It's a struggle sometimes to not buy things I want, but it will be worth it in the end once my credit card debt is paid off. Read how I did it…
I avoid going to social engagements with old friends because I worry about looking bad, feeling awkward, being judged, etc. I hold on to mounds and mounds of guilt from past failed relationships. I’m embarrassed by my shortcomings in this area, and they affect other areas of my life in major ways. I do it to myself and yet I can’t bring myself to cross certain barriers. I’d much rather send emails than talk on the phone. I have very few people I consider friends, and I don’t even know if they consider me a friend back.
