magnolialove




I'm doing 42 things
 

magnolialove's Life List

  1. 1. get accepted to Concordia University in Quebec
    1 entry
    3 people
  2. 2. go to McGill
    20 people
  3. 3. adopt
    569 people
  4. 4. live in Paris
    1 cheer
    824 people
  5. 5. go to a belle & sebastian concert
    21 people
  6. 6. violently kiss Conor Oberst
    1 cheer
    35 people
  7. 7. Go to Elliott Smith's memorial wall and sign it
    28 people
  8. 8. plant a magnolia tree
    5 people
  9. 9. learn to dance and not be embarrased to dance
    622 people
  10. 10. write a book
    26,018 people
  11. 11. pull a prank involving 100 lawn gnomes
    81 people
  12. 12. move to europe
    390 people
  13. 13. To live instead of exist
    1 entry
    10,875 people
  14. 14. sex
    2,704 people
  15. 15. master chess
    18 people
  16. 16. Fall in real love: ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can't live without each other love.
    1 entry
    1,288 people
  17. 17. learn to drive
    6,120 people
  18. 18. learn to read music
    1 entry
    676 people
  19. 19. change my name
    493 people
  20. 20. get clear skin (even if that means taking accutane)
    7 people
  21. 21. be in an indie film
    1 cheer
    21 people
  22. 22. live in my own apartment
    37 people
  23. 23. Never grow up.
    687 people
  24. 24. make a new friend
    685 people
  25. 25. learn to play an instrument
    1,179 people
  26. 26. improve my vocabulary
    1,068 people
  27. 27. buy a Vespa
    343 people
  28. 28. lose 25 pounds
    1 entry . 1 cheer
    1,456 people
  29. 29. go to art school
    1 entry
    296 people
  30. 30. be daring and passionate, to hell with the consequences
    1 entry
    74 people
  31. 31. become fluent in french
    1,350 people
  32. 32. see the northern lights
    16,869 people
  33. 33. backpack through Europe
    4,955 people
  34. 34. journalism
    41 people
  35. 35. fly in a helicopter
    204 people
  36. 36. write a film
    25 people
  37. 37. film a documentary
    105 people
  38. 38. Improve my posture
    2,660 people
  39. 39. have my caricature drawn
    1 entry . 1 cheer
    86 people
  40. 40. decide what the hell I would like to do with the rest of my life
    6,963 people
  41. 41. have conversations late into the night with fascinating people
    1 entry
    2,206 people
  42. 42. see the world
    1,962 people
Recent entries
get accepted to Concordia University in Quebec
I REALLY WANT TO GO TO CONCORDIA 14 months ago

my two best friends want to go too.
i dont even care if they get in, i mean obviously i’d love love love to be with them, but i’d go either way.
i just really need to get away from my parents, from Vancouver, from being here and being here and being here and thinking that i’ll forever be here.
i just really need to have some distance, some long stretch of empty canada between me and all my memories.
i’d love to be in Quebec again, speaking french and pretending im in Paris, because sometimes i think i really do belong in paris.
but for now, Concordia is the goal.



lose 25 pounds
i'd be wickedly underweight 14 months ago

but i’ve never been SKINNY. ive been slim, as in fit enough that nobody could REALLY call me fat, but i’ve never been skinny, and i’d really love to be.



Fall in real love: ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can't live without each other love.
i really really want to find the difference.. 14 months ago

i really really want to find the difference between love and dependency. I think sometimes there is a fine line between thinking you love someone and thinking you need them. sometimes the one person you feel safe around isnt the one person you necessarily love. sure, you may love them as a person close to your heart, but i think it is easy to get confused between loving someone and being IN love with someone. furthermore, i believe dependency is a way of prolonging love- pretending it still exists when really only the feelings of safety and necessity remain. love is dangerous, because as soon as you admit you love someone you’ve invested all your emotions in that person, and they know that. its hard after that to not read their interactions with you as a reaction to you loving them.
i want love without these complications. without replaying phone calls in my head, questioning motifs and your past emotions to try and justify your lack of committance or lack of enthusiasm or over sensitivity or over dependence. i want love like i see on movie screens. i want to hold your hand while walking along the sea-wall, humming lyrics to OUR song and not worrying about where anything is going. i want to be consumed by the moment of being in love, and not have to wonder later if it meant more to me or if i should be more careful of your feelings, if you are falling harder than i am. i want to stumble into love with you, and have you stumble too. to know 100 percent that we are both happy, and that our mistakes may mean a lot to eachother but they cannot break the other. i want to be able to make mistakes with you, and forget past fights, and bathe in the fact that everything will be okay so long as love still consumes us.



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