markus3086

This entry will probably be pretty long but if you read it and give your opinion I will greatly appreciate it. The relationship was great for a while and I could not be any happier with the woman I was with. We were set to go to the same college and we had discussed marriage even. She had promised me that no matter what happens she wanted to go to the same college. Well at the very last moment she broke the promise and decided to go to a college that was thousands of miles away. We decided the long distance was probably do-able but this is where everything went wrong. After several months of the relationship she started threatening to break up with me, she would be extremely mad at me if I didn’t call her and was instead studying in the library, and she started to say extremely hurtful things to me. When we were able to see each other though, we were happy. During sophomore year of college, she started to be extremely mean(say I’m just like all her exes, I hate you, you don’t care about me, I thought about breaking up with you, etc) and excluding a wonderful birthday(she came to visit me) we started to want each other to change and we would fight and make each other cry. During the summer we broke up and I figured that was the end of it so I started to try and make myself better by being more social, and I started to get close to this other girl. We nearly had sex, but I decided it wasn’t a good thing to jump into this relationship like this. Well my ex started calling me alot and I decided that we should really give it another try, and she then found out that I was close to this other girl for a while. She starts to say that I cheated on her and it was completely wrong of me to do that. For the next two months I did everything I could to make her happy(take her to nice restaurants, pick her up from work about every day, leave my work to take her to lunch, go to mexico with her when her father died and comforted her the whole time even though I didn’t know spanish and wasn’t able to do anything really fun, took her on lots of dates, bought her a little puppy, etc), I mean I REALLY tried to show her I love her and I care. The summer ended and we gave each other promise rings to be better to each other. Now we are back in this long distance relationship and in less than a week she is questioning if I love her and if I care about her and she doesnt trust me because I had that small relationship with that other girl while we were separated during the summer, and it just hurts me because I gave up my WHOLE summer just to make her happy and I have even been thinking about sending her flowers every month. Last night we started arguing and she kept talking about what happened months ago(excluding completely how much I’ve done for her for two months) and we ended up hanging up on each other and I havent talked to her since. I just dont know what I should think about our relationship. What do you think?

I am on my 11th day and I am having a lot of trouble, more so than the first week. Was the second week this hard for any of you? If so, how did you get through it? I was hoping that after one week I could develop enough self control but that urge has seemed to be rather constant and pressuring me all day. It frustrates me that I can’t even sit at my desk and do my homework without feeling that urge. I really want to make it to two weeks and I am worried that I am about to fall soon if I cant stop this urge. Any one have any advice or anything to say? Anything is appreciated. Thanks

I am now on my 8th day! I honestly don’t think I have ever gone a week without doing it so I am so happy that I succeeded my first small goal. My new goal is to make it two weeks. I want to thank everyone for being there for me for whenever I have an urge to do it I just open up this site and read the entries. God truly is there for us when we need him most. I wish everyone luck with their goals. Happy Easter!