m, the mjato

all it takes is constantly overworking. two hours of sleep, 20 hours at work, 5 hours of sleep, 35 at work and on the sets. sleep is overrated. sleep is addictive. why aren’t we eating some yellow pills to replace sleep? i am going to talk to the guy in charge about that. you’ll see.

and i have a painting on my white wall. it helps.
and a yellow rubber duck.

the place is everything.

you wake up, hang from the balcony singing morning sigarette. come inside, jump in the shower licking morning tea. you are on the street, and the balconies with other starfishes smile at you. and smile. how irreversibly happy.

What Can We Do?_{by Charles Bukowski}

at their best, there is gentleness in Humanity.
some understanding and, at times, acts of
courage
but all in all it is a mass, a glob that doesn’t
have too much.
it is like a large animal deep in sleep and
almost nothing can awaken it.
when activated it’s best at brutality,
selfishness, unjust judgments, murder.

what can we do with it, this Humanity?

nothing.

avoid the thing as much as possible.
treat it as you would anything poisonous, vicious
and mindless.
but be careful. it has enacted laws to protect
itself from you.
it can kill you without cause.
and to escape it you must be subtle.
few escape.

it’s up to you to figure a plan.

I have met nobody who has escaped.

I have met some of the great and
famous but they have not escaped
for they are only great and famous within
Humanity.

I have not escaped
but I have not failed in trying again and
again.

before my death I hope to obtain my
life.

~from blank gun silencer – 1994 ~