mycatistrue

I went to the University of Louisville for a year and I did fine first semester. I got all A’s and B’s. Second semester on the other hand was a complete disaster. I made 1 B, 1 D and 2 F’s. Now, I am working at UPS and they are offering 100% tuition coverage and if I pass my classes I get a $500 bonus each semester. I’ve signed up and enrolled in 3 classes. English II, History II and Social Problems. If I fail again not only will I lose my tuition coverage, I will also have to pay for the tuition out of my pocket and not get $500. School starts next Tuesday for me and I am hoping for the best!

So I’ve had around 4-5 hours of sleep every night for the past 2-3 weeks. A few months ago I was able to sleep for 10-12 hrs. straight without waking up and suddenly I wasn’t even able to stay asleep for 3. After that it became harder for me to even fall asleep. I’ve been working 3rd shift for almost a year so I don’t think that is the problem. I feel most of my problem is coming from all of the new things that are starting in my life right now. They are all good things too. I am about ready to go back to U of L (after sitting out for a year) next week. I’ve met a great guy! I am getting my first car this week! Maybe I am too excited to sleep?

I really really want to but something is keeping from doing so. I am so scared of kissing him. I am thinking maybe I am afraid of what that will lead to. He likes me a whole lot and I like him a whole lot but I just feel like it’s the worst timing ever. My last relationship (which just happens to have been my first) was horrible and I don’t know if that has something to do with it too. It was almost a year ago and I am completely over it and I am 100 positive that Dru would never treat me the way I have been before. I keep telling myself to just do it but I don’t want it to turn out badly:/ Maybe it’s just a risk I have to take. I’m 20! Why am I acting like I’m 13?