mysirensong

I spent two years of my life working on my thesis and I must submit the shortened version. If I don’t I will regret it forever.

I have two beautiful girls, ages 9 and 10. When they were little I felt that I was a wonderful mother—always playing with them, reading to them, loving them. However, over the last few years things have changed. I now work full time and feel so exhausted when I get home that I just don’t have the energy to play soccer in the yard or read books to them for half an hour. Sometimes I let them play on the computer or watch movies for two or three hours and I feel horribly guilty. They are very smart, like books, and I do still enjoy them, but I just carry around this guilt. On top of this, I feel that I cannot keep the house properly clean and so I feel too embarrassed to invite many of their friends over. Does anyone else feel like this?

Age has deprived me of my flexibility. I remember when I could touch my elbows to the floor . . . When you spend time dancing ballet it stays with you a long time, but I would like to have some of my old flexibility back. I do not want to feel old.