pennygerken

Please see my other entry on Get A Tattoo with a Significant Meaning. Here’s the pic of the cat. I am pleased with how it came out – the photo was taken the day after I had it done, so it’s a bit scabby!

Funny that my only concern with the tattoo was that the tattooist got it exactly right – being an artist myself this was very important to me. Of course, once the agony started with the needle all I could think of was “don’t rush her to finish, she’ll bugger it up if you do.”

It’s not bad. I could have done better, but then I am not a tatooist.

Now that is a title to be proud of.

Sounds like the latest Tim Burton movie.

I think I cheated a little because it’s not a parlour, it’s a studio. Anyway, it’s based in Poole and it’s where I went to have my first tattoo and quite honestly, I think it will be my last.

I have long wanted to have a tattoo and with my beloved’s arms covered in them, it seemed I should have at least one. In fact, I really wanted to celebrate my love for him in a permanent way – dangerous, I know. Having had one disastrous marriage I am fully aware that sometimes things just don’t work out (although I truly believe it will this time) and so I wanted to be careful what I stuck permanently into my flesh. Since his name is Kat and I adore the feline species, a cat seemed obvious. On my internet browsing I came across Emily Strange and her cats, and that was that.

My “Sort Of Daughter In Law” (henceforth referred to as sodil) wanted one too and I helped her to design it. Hers was to be the word Angel on her lower back. So clutching our tattoos in our hands we hotfooted our way to the local tattoo parlour – having checked it and others out on the web first. They were not over enthusiastic to help us and we were slightly put off by a certain member of staff, who we both prayed would not be doing our tattoos. After a brief moment of solid fear, we were told they couldn’t do it today and booked us in for a few days later.

So Thursday arrived and we found ourselves in Dr Feelgoods. Our tattooist was a young girl, who clearly would not stand for any nonsense. She told me to sit and I did. She told me not to move and I said I wouldn’t. She told me not to flinch away from the pain. And I …..PAIN???? No, that wasn’t mentioned before….my beloved said it was a bit uncomfortable to start with and then it just became irritating. There was nothing about pain.

Now I could feel the sweat prickling my entire body. What in God’s name had I let myself in for?

And then she slapped some goo on and started.

Ok. I’ve given birth to 3 (what could be loosely described as) children and 2 of those births were traumatic. So I can cope with many many hours of pain, but this was horrid. Now it may be the shoulder blade is a nasty place and I am not very fleshy, so I suspect the arms (particularly on a man) are not so painful. However, this was really nasty. It certainly felt like someone was scraping a sharp needle deeply into my skin. To be fair, the tattooist did it in stages, about 10 – 20 seconds each. Each time my threshold of pain would slowly be eroded and then she would stop, just for a few seconds and I could breathe again. I certainly was glad that it was not a big one and was regretting that it was black (this is the most painful colour apparently). After a lifetime and me constantly asking, like a child, is it done yet, it was. The relief was tremendous. She then put some more goo and a large bandage like covering on it.

Now it was SODIL’s turn. Hers took just as long. She didn’t seem to grimace as much as me and for a while seemed to become comatose. I couldn’t help noticing that her knuckles were so deep in the upholstery that they had gone from white to green.

Eventually we were given aftercare instructions. Keep the bandage on for 3 hours, then wash the area with soap and water. Apply savlon and continue to apply savlon 3 times a day, eventually changing to moisturiser.

We went out of the tattoo parlour in a desperate search for a pub.

James (sodil’s other half and my son) suddenly pointed out that I was bleeding. This gave me a panic flash and I pictured myself in hospital with a hemorrhage. Quickly checking out SODIL’s I could see hers was bleeding too.

100 yards later I noticed SODIL’s was oozing blood and goo down her backside. So we found a chemist and got some tissues and wipes to sort it out. NB we only wiped the dribbling goo – I knew we had to leave the tattoo’d area alone. This ended up with us standing outside Superdrug (with 3 policemen watching us suspiciously) and me wiping SODIL’s bum. Lovely.

Following alcohol and crisps, we felt much better and went home. The tattoos were throbbing pleasantly and SODIL’s was certainly stopping her from moving freely.

We washed each others down as instructed and had a pretty uncomfortable night.

The following morning we both decided to avoid the shower (not allowed a bath) and here is a photo of mine the morning after.

It is now a week and a half later, and it has healed very well. I went swimming a week after it was done and it has peeled a lot since then. But it’s stopped itching and will be fine in a week or so. Sodil’s is healed completely – but she has much younger skin than me.

I’ve also found out since that the most painful places to have a tattoo are your back, breast and ankle (forgetting the more bizarre areas for now).

I am very pleased with mine, but I would not go again – too bloody painful.

If you want to act or direct then there are plenty of opportunities out there. If you want fame or celebrity then that is a different goal entirely.

You have 2 choices really

1 KEEP YOUR CURRENT JOB AND DO IT LOCALLY

I live in the UK and every reasonably sized town or city has at least a dozen or so amateur rep, musical, theatrical and operatic societies. I am sure it must be the same in many countries. And don’t perpetuate the myth that amateur performances are crude, badly acted or sung. This is one myth that the professionals in tv and film love to extol in their self congratutory way – with any programme featuring a back drop of an amateur show being an opportunity to ham it up in the crudest possible manner. Don’t believe it – just find a company near you and join up!

2 DROP EVERYTHING AND GO FOR IT

There are many brilliant theatre schools to get into. Find out about their next intake and get your name down to audition. You will need to be able to dance, act and sing (for most) and you will need to have a reasonable talent in at least one of those. In the UK you will probably need to pay for your tuition and I don’t suppose it’s too different elsewhere. You could be looking at around £3k – 6k a year. Meanwhile get yourself into the local rep and start learning. I have several mates currently in various theatre schools and all are loving it and all tell me it’s incredibly hard work.

If you want to perform then get out there and do it. Waiting for the Big Break in Hollywood is probably unrealistic – and you need to get experience anyway.

Because my greatest ability was art, I opted not to pursue a career in acting/singing. But I still felt the need to do it. The amateur stage gave me that opportunity. If you are good enough, then all the biggest roles in theatre and opera will be open to you. And don’t forget you will often (depending on the size of the company) be performing on exactly the same stage as the professional companies. I am lucky to have performed so many of the leading mezzo roles (and loved doing it) and now I am directing as well – which is just as fulfilling – the fantastic opportunity to make your vision come true (see pic above). I am currently working on Die Fledermaus. It’s great being a big fish in a small pool!

Don’t be ashamed of the word Amateur – it simply means you are performing because you LOVE it and not because you get paid to do it. I have seen hundreds of amateur actors and singers over the years and have seen hundreds of professional shows – and I can honestly say there is very little difference between the performances of many of the actors. The show itself, with the money thrown at it in a professional performance is VERY different!

And yes, there are some truly great actors and actresses who rightly deserve their fame and fortune – but if you look closely at the “amateurs”, you will find people there who SHOULD be on the professional stage – people who will make you laugh and cry, who take your breath away.

Be one of those.