pethoney81

it’s hard!!!! decided to start on monday 16th july. manage to avoid getting the ‘stuff’ for 2 days. and today… have to call back my dealer coz need crash diet for a party this weekend. how shallow is that???!!!!

i’ve tried to browse on the net bout recovery program which offer free advice or tips or online counseling. but to my surprise, most of them require some kind of payment or insurance cover. how is it possible for me to help myself to stop my addiction????

i just have no idea where to start getting organized. my desk is full of stacks of last semesters notes, books, etc. my room look the same since the past 1 year i guess. my closet is full of clothes that i dont wear. luckily my husband handle all the laundry and toilet cleaning. seems that i cant really begin with anything rite now…

By writing this first entry, i am taking my first step to change my life. it is more to ‘fixing’ than ‘changing’ my life, literally. I love the life that i had been through for the past 27 years. Somehow at this point, i need to do something with it so that in future when i review back my life, I’ll love it more…

For the past 3 weeks i have ‘checked-out’ myself (Oprah used to say this phase a lot… ekkekeke) and for the first time i did some reality check on my present life. Yeah… people say the truth is ugly, but i think ‘ugly’ is ok rather than ‘indescribable’ coz at least i know what to be fixed to make it look better. Although honestly i dont know how and where to start with, but I am ready and determine to do it now. So, i start with a general and common goal that is to get organized and set some new goals.

in the past, i had several attempts to make positive changes or do things differently bout my life. And, i never complete any of them, either i back out in the middle of the process or i end up failing miserably. I hope to know some tips and advice from those who have been successfully completing their first goal in life and would love to share their experience to inspire other beginners like myself….