I'm doing 35 things
I have the world’s greatest boyfriend. He loves me, treats me like a princess and wants to marry me. The problem is I can’t let go of the fact that he was married before. He married an old girlfriend who was an exchange student from japan and she was being forced to go back. The marriage ended horrible with her leaving him and cheating on him, in barely over a year. He has told me hundreds of times that he never would have married her if he hadn’t been pressured into it by her and her parents, and that it was never a real marriage. He has also said that he never wanted to grow old with her, or travel with her, or have children with her- all things that he talks about doing with me constantly. I know she’s a horrible person who used a wonderful boy to stay in the country, but I can’t seem to get over it. I feel like less than her and the idea of coming second to her makes me ill. I am very afriad that I’m slowly going to poison a perfect relationship by not being able to get over something that ended over four years ago, and has no place in our lives currently. ick. I just keep shooting myself in the foot.
piegi's Life List
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1. be happy on my own..not having to rely on someone else for happiness
1 entry . 6 cheers168 people -
2. become a morning person.
2 entries1,536 people -
3. Become Financially Independent
6,299 people -
4. start a pharmacuticals take back program
1 entry1 person -
5. see a cure for insulin-dependent diabetes
2 entries . 2 cheers25 people -
6. make a difference
2 entries . 3 cheers7,191 people -
7. read every book I own
1 entry2,138 people -
8. learn to fix my car
1 entry . 1 cheer84 people -
9. learn to sing
1 entry . 1 cheer2,865 people -
10. stop judging people
1 entry . 1 cheer273 people -
11. Get a PhD
1 entry . 3 cheers2,962 people -
12. feel comfortable
1 cheer7 people -
13. Live less inside my own head
1 entry . 6 cheers357 people -
14. KEEP A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY
4 cheers35 people -
15. write a book and have it published
2,727 people -
16. make my own clothes
1 entry . 1 cheer2,338 people -
17. be a better daughter
836 people -
18. feel beautiful
1 cheer2,217 people -
19. Worry less.
1 entry4,778 people -
20. stop being so hard on myself
1 entry . 3 cheers160 people -
21. take more photographs
2 entries1,777 people -
22. be more honest, truely honest with myself and others
2 cheers9 people -
23. get an EU passport
2 entries . 1 cheer16 people -
24. be more spiritual
1 cheer1,048 people -
25. stop cursing so much
53 people -
26. Send a postcard to Postsecret
1 entry3,024 people -
27. travel
1 entry8,749 people -
28. volunteer overseas
1 entry . 2 cheers265 people -
29. learn to surf
3 entries . 6 cheers8,070 people -
30. find out what my blood type is
2 cheers1,377 people -
31. take the GREs
30 people -
32. know when to walk away
48 people -
33. learn when to shut up
24 people -
34. be my ideal weight
39 people -
35. Learn to let go of the past
1 entry64 people
Recent entries
So I’ve fallen hard. While I’m so happy to have found someone I love, and who loves me in return, I’m so scared, I’m afraid I may not be able to do this. I’m trying really hard not to do something stupid and end it out of fear.
I finally got all of my banking stuff sorted out and I have been balancing my checkbook regularly. Man I spend a lot of money on crap I don’t need…I think that doing this may actually help me spend less, at least I hope it does!
