pinkchi84

I broke up with my bf of 2 1/2 yrs. about 4 months ago. In the first month I met a man and fell head over heals for him. On paper, we are perfectly compatible. However, I realize that this is what I do… I consistently jump from one relationship to another without any time to recover and reflect. So, I’ve ended it with the new guy and am vowing to stay single. For ten years, I have jumped from man to man and if I don’t take this time now to be free and truly independent, this cycle will continue. I’m emotionally drained from pushing and being pushed into romances when my heart’s not ready. This is the beginning. Day 1.

Sounds like that stupid Barenaked Ladies song. It’s been 7 weeks since I started my goal to not drink. So far things have been going great. I have a cleared head. I no longer feel dumb and numb. I have lost 5 pounds. I did mess up last week though. I ended up very drunk because I thought I could handle 2 drinks (amazing how quickly my tolerance has decreased). It was disgusting while being drunk and especially the next day. I hated it. How could I have liked this for so long? The only the good about getting drunk that night was the alcohol, it tasted so good. But other than that I felt awful.

This is for real. I will continue to not drink. Not even one drink. For myself. There, now it’s official.

So, I am on day 10. It has been hard, although not as hard as I thought. I am single, live in the city, and go out almost every night. I have been out 4 times since I stopped drinking (all to bars might I add). Although I was very tempted to have “just one drink” I sipped eagerly on my diet Coke instead. I found that I still had alot of fun. I danced sober!!!!!! Yesterday was my birthday and I talked to my boyfriend about having a drink. He thought it was a bad idea and I was glad that he was there. It has been incredibly helpful so far with friends saying good job and just saying I understand when I say I’m not drinking tonight. I was afraid that I was going to lose some friends but it seems to be working out pretty smoothly. Good luck to those in the beginnings. I know I am still there. It gives me hope knowing that there are many of you out there thinking the exact same thing. Until then…