I have 90 days sober today!! I feel accomplished, but I also know it’s just the beginning. I see the benefits of living a sober life, and I look forward to my future, for once! I do still struggle sometimes, like last night I went to a birthday party at a restaurant and some people brought wine. It’s crazy how I still have the instinct to have a glass… I see how I have to keep sobriety my #1 priority at all times. But I know I can do it, one day at a time :)
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almost there
2 months ago
Today is 85 days sober :) And recently, I started to see why I drank. I’m so uncomfortable with myself! Being sober, I’m learning more about myself in a month than I have in the past 2 years. It’s really difficult for me to accept myself, and drinking let me not care about anything, especially myself.
It’s scary to see how quickly a fun time can turn into such a train wreck. However, train wrecks can eventually get cleaned up. With some work and lots of hope and support, it’s been possible for me to stay sober and move forward. I ALMOST HAVE 90 DAYS! That’s amazing to me :)
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This weekend looked like it would be a struggle… If I didn’t choose to be sober at this point in my ‘alcoholic timeline,’ I’d probably be blacked out by now getting into who knows what kind of drama. There’s a 3-day party held by an organization I was a part of and I went every semester since fall 05. It’s this weekend and started last night.
So how do I get through this? I hang out with sober people. I pray. I spend time with my family. I study. I go on sites like this and talk about it! I know I’m not alone and I know I will get through this. No amount of alcohol could make me as happy as I want to ultimately be. I hear people say sometimes, sobriety gave them what they wanted alcohol or drugs to give them. I like that, it gives me hope.
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