poetriluvah




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move out of parents house (read all 2 entries…)
Not until I graduate..

This will not happen until I graduate. My father and I are actually much better now.. so I don’t need to move out. :)



I want to go to the gym
Untitled

i was on a roll. Started going with a friend about three times a week and what happened? I got so busy with school, and then i got super sick! soo now i haven’t been. it was great for all three weeks that it lasted, now i’m back to square one. Summer is almost here, get it together!!



stop cursing (read all 3 entries…)
getting a little better

No, I’m getting MUCH better! TODAY four people almost killed me with their lack of DRIVING skills, and did I yell anything that resembled a curse word? NOPE! Not once!! I’M SO PROUD OF MYSELF. I feel very good about my progress. I’m trying to be much more positive, and I think that is helping with this whole cursing shindig.



do the splits (read all 4 entries…)
Pretty Pathetic

I haven’t even tried.
I actually think I’ve gotten worse. Is that possibe?
I think so. So i guess i’m going to go meditate or something. While attempting to touch my toes. Hey, its a start!



stop cursing (read all 3 entries…)
Stupid drivers-it is all their fault

This is so not working. I thought that the majority of my potty mouth moments occured while in traffic, well i discovered how wrong i while monitoring it these past few months. I don’t think I’ve gotten any better. That kinda sucks, Im gonna work harder so that i wont be so quick to scream F—you at the random people who cut me off everyday. I hate LA.



find a better paying job
I'm so over it

I did it, I did it. I’m super happy. Yea I said super happy. Don’t make fun of me. Ok so technically I didn’t find a better paying job, but i found better job that gives me double the hours i had a my last pathetic job. So i suppose I accomplished this, right?! Yea, i did. PLus any job is better than my last job…stupid rich ass people who think the sun rises out of their asses…sorry I have flasbacks.



transfer to a univerisity (read all 2 entries…)
Cal State something here i come

So i started applying to different schools.
I really hope i get in everywhere I have pretty goood grades
so i don’t see why i wouldn’t. Yea, I probably will be fine. I better be fine, I’m rambling. OOps. I should be in a university by next semester. cross your fingers!



get over depression (read all 5 entries…)
Depression can kiss my ass

I’m so over depression!! I’ve been off the meds for some months now, and I haven’t flipped out or anything so i think thats a good thing!!
Things that make me happy or keep me from being sad
I got a new job..YAY!!! I like it a LOTTTTT.
School started, so I’m super busy not so great but it keeps me busy
My boyfriend and are getting better at communicating..i think
I love myself!!!!!! kick ass, this is good



get over depression (read all 5 entries…)
On the up & up

Soo things have been ok, but i’ve been feeling a little better. When I turn into super bitch i have to stop and seriously re-adjust my attitude. So when i realize that I’m being rude for no reason i try to take a moment to just breathe. I stopped the meds my rheumatologist said they’re interferring with lupus so yea. School finally started so now i’m too busy to really be sad. Sometimes i’m still sad but for the most part i’m too busy to think about it. so on the up and up i guess things are getting better.



Finish what I start (read all 4 entries…)
I think I'm getting better!!!

So now I write EVerything down,and i’ve noticed I’m much more organized. This probably has a lot to do with the fact that I’m taking 17 units this semester, and working so i have no choice but to be finish what i start…otherwise I’ll never get anywhere in life.
Things to do this week
-Pay ticket off, and make a new court date
-Finish all of chapter 3 homework for math :(
-Move my old stuff out of my house
-Find the new number for my telephone banking system
-Start working on the back room
-Get my tires aligned



do the splits (read all 4 entries…)
I should give up...but i won't

Yea soo I think I’ve stretched like four times…lol. That is just sad. I’m going to try to do better now…



Finish what I start (read all 4 entries…)
Progress baby

So over the past two days I’ve:
Mailed off my poem
Gone to the doctor
Bought my mother’s bday present
stretch

I know it doesn’t sound like a whole lot, but hey its progress. Ya gotta start somewhere! I’m excited. This felt good.



do the splits (read all 4 entries…)
at this rate i'll never get there

I haven’t stetched since I put added this to my list. I guess i should go get started on that. Yea. Why am i so lazy?!



Finish what I start (read all 4 entries…)
Untitled

I really need to:
clean my room
mail off my poem
pick up my mom’s bday present
take my ex his freakin stuff
finish the first chpt. in my hiragana (japanese) book
stretch

What I’ve done:
not a damn thing…

Hopefuly this site will help me see what needs to be done and remind me that i need to do it, like now. lol. I’m gonna go stretch now.



transfer to a univerisity (read all 2 entries…)
I'm ready for the "real world"

there isn’t any reason that it has taken me this long to get myself together. After i got over the shock of moving into la la land, i forgot the reason i came to this God forsaken city. School. But now i’m so focused and i’m ready to move on with life. If everything goes as planned i will be able to apply to my school of choice this summer. I really want this. I’m not even going to tell my family-seeing as how they love to remind where i haven’t transfered. I’m just gonna go. I think i can, i think i can, i think i can…



get over depression (read all 5 entries…)
its great, and then it sucks.

Last night i went to this dance concert. It. was. amazing. During those two hours i was at peace with myself. I wasn’t worrying about my bills, my shitty job, or my parents. I didn’t care about school, friends, or the gas that it took to get there. All i was able to do was look at some very talented dancers do their thing on the stage. It makes me want to take more classes, so i can get better. But that would require both time and money-which i’m seriously lacking. And that made me sad. I love to dance, so why is it so hard? Why can’t i have money to do what i love, or the energy? Why does lupus make me so tired i can barely blink. So stupid this is really stupid.



stop cursing (read all 3 entries…)
freakin drivers man

i swear this is so hard. I’ve been really trying to cut back rather than just stopping all together. But when some bright LA driver cuts me off I sorta kinda have no control over what comes out. Or maybe i’m not trying hard enough. If people would just learn how to drive my mouth wouldn’t be so bad. Sheez



get over depression (read all 5 entries…)
An upside??

So today I’m working. This week has been really crazy, with school/rehearsals, work, school. I’ve had so many errands to run on my off days that they didn’t really feel like off days, lol. So now its sat and i get off in a few hours, but not to rest. I have to go home eat, get ready and drive all the way to the valley to watch a ballet tonight. I would take the night off but i need to do a dance critique for my ballet class. And the class ends on tues, so this isn’t really optional. But since i’ve been so busy I haven’t really been that sad, so that would be the upside of all this. hmm I think i’m on to something.



move out of parents house (read all 2 entries…)
I want my own casa

Living in LA is so expensive, but living with my dad will drive me to insanity. I’ve decided to move out…although i don’t make enough right now I will get a second job and that should be enough. Plus my sister is graduating this June so she can move in with me. If my mom helps with her half, and we have decent jobs then we should be ok. I think. All i want is a 2 bdrm, in a good neighborhood. Is that too much to ask for?



Finish what I start (read all 4 entries…)
One step @ a time

I never realized how many things i’ll start but won’t finish! But since now i know, I’m going to work hard to change. For starters I’m going to mail in my poem…I recently (well not so recent anymore maybe a month or so ago) submitted a poem to a contest. It was chosen to be published this spring-so what didn’t i finish you might be wondering? I haven’t sent back the form to confirm it with my signature, it sounds so simple and yet i haven’t done it yet. So by the end of today that poem will be in the mail…I hope.



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