I finally decided I need some extra help, that it truly is a problem that cannot be solved with will-power alone. It was hard for me to decide that it doesn’t make me weak to take something for depression, but it’s what needed to happen. I just started taking Sam-E a couple days ago but it’s making a positive difference. The first day I took it was insane, I had a pretty strong anxiety attack in the middle of one of my classes and afterward my moods were up and down so much it was like a yo-yo for most of the rest of the day. But I continued taking it and haven’t had anymore problems like that since. I’ve just felt happier, much more content then usual. I just hope it continues to work and I don’t have anymore episodes, if I do I’ll stop taking Sam-E and go talk to a doctor. But for now I’m just glad to be feeling better.
♥♥ Rissa ♥♥'s Life List
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1. read my Bible regularly
2 entries . 2 cheers23 people -
2. grow in my relationship with Christ
2 entries . 5 cheers46 people -
3. To live instead of exist
3 entries . 3 cheers10,899 people -
4. Beat my depression
2 entries1,686 people -
5. accept the things I cannot change, have courage to change the things I can and have the wisdom to know the difference
2 entries . 2 cheers294 people -
6. overcome bulimia
5 entries . 1 cheer208 people -
7. get in shape
1 entry . 1 cheer9,386 people -
8. lose 50 lbs
2 entries541 people -
9. Have a BMI of less than 30
4 entries4 people -
10. lose 100 pounds
8 team members . 49 entries . 3 cheers1,755 people -
11. Find a balance between the things I want to do and the things I need to do
1 entry . 1 cheer2,370 people -
12. Save $400
2 people -
13. Save up $1,000
1 entry45 people -
14. Move out of my parents house into a place of my own
1 entry136 people -
15. start playing soccer again
1 cheer20 people -
16. learn to play tennis
1 entry . 1 cheer587 people -
17. Take 'X' out of my size
1 entry . 1 cheer4 people -
18. learn to kayak
1 cheer379 people -
19. windsurf
93 people -
20. parasail
303 people -
21. paraglide
209 people -
22. go bungee jumping
1,301 people -
23. hang glide
679 people -
24. sky dive
1 entry2,135 people -
25. learn how to drive a motorcycle
2 entries77 people -
26. be more patient
2 cheers2,907 people -
27. go on a road trip with no predetermined destination
1 cheer18,607 people -
28. backpack through Europe
2 cheers4,967 people -
29. swim under a waterfall
1 cheer145 people -
30. solve a rubiks cube
1 entry451 people -
31. Swim with dolphins
1 cheer7,368 people -
32. get 4.0 gpa this quarter
3 entries2 people -
33. be pushed up against a wall and kissed passionately
1 entry . 1 cheer2 people -
34. do 50 push-ups and 50 sit-ups a day
3 people -
35. Respect myself again.
3 entries4 people -
36. procrastinate less
1 entry1,654 people -
37. Do the Couch to 5k running plan
312 people -
38. spend a whole day in Barnes & Noble sipping tea and browsing books
5 people -
39. Improve my bowling
1 entry6 people -
40. be celibate for a year
2 entries . 2 cheers10 people
How I did it: I realized, after one particularly bad year, that I needed to stop living the way I had been. That I needed to start communicating with God the way I used to, and even more then I used to. Once upon what feels like a lifetime ago, though it was only a few short years back, I talked with God on a fairly regular basis. I also had those break-down-on-your-knees-begging-and-pleading kind of prayer experiences 1-6 times a month. Then I lost my… Read how I did it…
How I did it: I turned in applications at several places. Albertsons, Hollywood Video, and all three local Dominos. One Dominos wasn't hiring, one was hiring but the hiring manager was on vacation, and the other actually worked out. When I first dropped off my application at this particular Dominos I didn't trust the employee I left it with to really talk to the hiring manager. So I checked back in two days after I dropped off my application. At first … Read how I did it…
How I did it: My family goes to Florida every few years for vacation. It's a two week trip. This year I stayed for five days because I couldn't afford to miss two weeks of school. College... growing up... yay!! :S Anyway, I flew out with my dad, brother, and one of my sisters, my mom and other sister took a separate flight. But had no choice but to fly home solo. I was nervous at first, but once we got going I realized I was quite comfortable, th… Read how I did it…
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that, for the most part, I do this now. It’s definitely been an improvement in my life. I’ve still got a long way to go, but it’s a step in the right direction.
it’s been 3 months and 10 days since I’ve had sex and I’m really glad I made the choice to be celibate. There are so many, much more important things in life. I’m not having any problem staying on this path at the moment, which I am ecstatic about. Sure, I miss sex, but when I think back to my past experiences its like watching a film real of someone else who happens to very strongly resemble me. But it doesn’t feel like me, there’s a disconnect there. I’m glad for that though, it means I’m turning away from being the person I was for most of 2008 and going back to the way I know I’m supposed to be, back to who I’m meant to be. This is by far one of the very best choices I’ve ever made for myself. Contrary to the self-defeating talk I presented in my original post, I see no reason why I would have a difficult time completing this goal. Of course now that I’ve said that I’ll probably eat those words, lol. But really, I’ve gained back lost self-respect, or I’ve started to anyway, and that is worth more then any amount of great sex in my book. A little over 25% of this goal = done. and I intend to finish.
