ryan19554

Trying to squeze the best out of life



I'm doing 17 things
 

How I did it
How to have my first kiss
It took me
14 years
It made me
feel loved


How to write a poem
It took me
1 day
It made me
Happy


Recent entries
stop being abused
IM SICK OF HIS SHIT! 5 months ago

I’m so sick of my dads shit talking to his kids like were a piece of crap and we are just supposed to take it. I mean you called your own daughter (my sister) a bitch right in front of us. You always make us feel like its our fault like we aren’t good enough that we are the ones who are always wrong that we are the screwed up ones. I would never talk to my son the way you have talked to me. Dad i’m not a loser i’m not a quitter and people will love me. I will not stand for this anymore now dad child services have already got involved once and if you for one second scream at me and take your anger out on me again I’M LEAVING! I’m old enough now to change the custody agreement. You have always taken your own life down the toilet but i’m not going to let you take mine, hell no, not anymore, im putting my foot down. I don’t deserve to be treated the way you treat me. For years now you have verbally abused me while other kids played with their friends you never talked to me and i had to be yelled at and cry believing it was all my fault. especially when i was a kid and didn’t know what was going on. Now that i can see clearly and see you for what you really are i want to get as far away as possible, your just a smuck. Dad we all know what you love best in your life, alcohol, take it and never talk to me again, because you’ve never been and never will be my father.



Open my heart
So cold and lonely sucks 6 months ago

Been through the worst shit. abuse from an alcoholic father. Another man who i thought was my father who left. Everybody even my friends left me to toil away into depression. But i know i need to live and be open to people in order to feel happy again,even though there may be disappointments i think it will be worth it



stop taking anti depressants
On my way there 6 months ago

I made a big step today my doctor would say it would be a while if I can stop taking them even up to 2 years which i believe is a load of crap so i experimented today and did not take them. I feel great



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