I'm doing 43 things
Growing is hard and it sucks. It asks me to face all the parts of myself that need work, all at once. There’s no intermediary of mindless work and socializing like if I had another job on the side. No it’s unfiltered ME all the time, facing these obstacles. It was great when I had an intermediary, it could be my escape, now it’s my vocation. I’m at the beginning of a 30 year journey, and it like any beginning: dark, chaotic.
scazza's Life List
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1. stop thinking
1 cheer89 people -
2. become an opera singer
2 cheers33 people -
3. Practicing 3 hours every day
1 person -
4. Spend more time on myself
16 people -
5. Become independent and purpose-driven again
1 cheer1 person -
6. Practice Yoga
4,282 people -
7. Make weekends in nature a priority
1 person -
8. Sabbath in nature without cell phone, tv, or computer
1 cheer1 person -
9. get married
20,986 people -
10. return to Calcutta
1 person -
11. Buy a House
13,863 people -
12. be free
1,111 people -
13. pray more
3,257 people -
14. row again
21 people -
15. stop suffering, stop being afraid of happiness, feel alive and forgive myself
26 people -
16. create my own limits, schedule, discipline
1 person -
17. learn martial arts
877 people -
18. go camping in the desert
3 people -
19. Sing Jenufa
1 cheer1 person -
20. Sing Tatyana
1 cheer1 person -
21. Get out in the world and acheive my goals, that is how I should be relating to people
1 cheer3 people -
22. Be more honest
2 cheers402 people -
23. Reconnect with my parents
2 cheers13 people -
24. Make travelling a priority again
6 people -
25. Visit the desert
1 cheer10 people -
26. Swim in the ocean this January
1 person -
27. Spend a summer in Croatia
1 cheer2 people -
28. Work on an archeological dig
1 cheer26 people -
29. Live in a dry climate
1 person -
30. Live in a small city
5 people -
31. Raise my children in New Zealand
2 cheers1 person -
32. Raise my children as educated, magical, open, individuals
2 cheers4 people -
33. Travel and work in lots of different countries
1 cheer14 people -
34. don't stop believin'
2 cheers29 people -
35. defeat the republicans
1 cheer254 people -
36. Maintain healthy relationships with myself and others
50 people -
37. Get away for a weekend with no cell phone or laptop
15 people -
38. Read my journals and refocus
3 people -
39. Go to Berkeley for graduate school
2 cheers2 people -
40. Sail around the world
932 people -
41. Become Financially Independent
6,299 people -
42. Take the GRE
1 cheer444 people -
43. Make a list of things to get out in case of fire
1 person
Recent entries
Or maybe it happens when you settle in anywhere. I think this goal really never ends, we become more powerful as we age.
On the day before my birthday, my last full day of being 25, I have realized how far I have come in the past year. There’s one hurdle left, that finding a job thing, but if that’s all that’s left I can tackle it. I have come so far and life has given me so much support, feedback, perspective, people, places, and a purpose. I have acheived everything I want in life right now and that is real power.
When I look at my last entry from when I entered this goal, I feel like I’ve come so far. I have trees on the street and in the backyard, a view to the water, rooms, walls and places to hang art and pictures, I have a windowseat, and this amazing authentic mexican neighborhood that is alive with tamales, elotes, fresh tacos, and champurrados. I still need to find my resources from here to Park Slope (where is the closest place to buy soymilk?!), basically where my life fits in with this place (and I’m disappointed that Fresh Direct doesn’t deliver here, but I’m used to that). This process has been exhausting and it took me out of whatever mental, professional, relational processes I was focusing on. It takes over everything. But we acheived it, giving up laundry, a huge kitchen and an easy commute. We have to get used to living in our landlord’s house, asking them for more than 5 minutes of hot water and to fix the water pressure. but god the sun on the fall trees is just beautiful. I don’t miss my old place at all, and that is significant.
