secretlistofmine

I was really sick last week. I had bronchitis that was going to become pneumonia. I couldn’t smoke. So I quit.

My boyfriend had told me when we started dating that he had never even thought about dating a smoker. I was special and I was the first and I would have to quit. I have wanted to quit. I am getting older and while I don’t have wrinkles yet, I can sense them coming on. It is best for me to quit.

I hope I can keep it up.

I’m not sure if it is final. Six months and one day from the day the clerk of the court stamped the paperwork was April 22, 2007. The ex hasn’t sent me the paperwork but I’m pretty sure it’s final now.

I will feel better when I get the papers but I have been telling people I’m single.

For all of you out there contemplating leaving…Just do it. I had a plan for leaving. I wasn’t able to follow it. I had just had enough! I used all of my resources and borrowed from family and used up a lot of favors from friends in order to do it, but I got out. It is so nice to be able to drive home and not have to worry about what kind of emotional storm I am heading into. I don’t have to call home to gauge how drunk the husband is so I can prepare myself. I don’t have to listen to ranting and raving. I don’t have to see my things thrown across the house and windows broken. I don’t have to face my neighbors in the morning after a big fight. I haven’t had to call the police or hide or pack up the dogs and drive around for hours with no place to go waiting for him to pass out.

it feels good. Even if your marriage is not quite that bad…it sucks to be unhappy. You are not doing anyone any good by staying. I understand that every situation is different, but leave as soon as you can!

I would suggest everyone, no matter how together you are to get some counseling as soon as you leave. Not that marriage counseling crap, but counseling by yourself. Only for you. But don’t tell anyone but your people about it, if you must tell anyone. Sometimes it takes a professional telling you that you will be ok to make it ok.

Good Luck!

I stopped trying to loose for a month or so. I wasn’t totally pigging out, but I surely wasn’t dieting either. So, a week and a half ago, I got super sick. The flu mixed with some allergies from my new cat. I only felt like eating soup. I happened to weigh myself, not shocking as I do it every day. I weighed 144! AHHHHHH. So, I bought myself some SlimFast and some soup. I week and a half later I’m down to 135, as of this morning. I also have not been drinking booze. I’m sure that takes care of about 5 pounds of it, maybe less. It helps that my bf can’t drink because he is on medication for a couple of weeks.

So, 135 and I only have a couple pairs of pants that still don’t fit. My hip bones are poking out a little, so are my ribs. I almost have my razor sharp clavicles back. Soon. I figure I will be back down to 130 by the end of the weekend.

The best part of this is two weeks ago I was at work and everyone was commenting on how fat I looked. They were telling me I looked pregnant! I have to work this weekend, and I can tell you that I don’t look at all pregnant anymore!