JuneBug

I have to start exercising here. I feel so dumb. I lost a ton of weight over the summer, and didn’t even think about how easy it was going to be to gain the weight I lost. It’s ridiculous. I also need to purchase an accurate scale soon. This is SO not cool…

One of the things I really hate about being here is that I find out stuff about myself that I wish I didn’t know… Let me explain. A friend on my hall is always joking about me being a home schooler. A lot of people are surprised when I tell them that I was home schooled, which is nice, but this friend makes me feel like I am such a stereotypical home schooler. I probably am on some levels, but they act like it’s a bad thing. Like asking me if I know about some random game or something, and when I say no, they are like “ah right. Home schooled.” It makes me feel naive and stupid sometimes. Anyway, it’s been frustrating finding out that I actually fit into a stereotype. >.<

Also, a lot of people are already pairing up, and it’s easy to look at myself and think “What’s wrong with me? Am I not worth anyone’s time?” I keep trying to remind myself that I’ll find someone some day, but right now it’s kind of depressing.

There is a boy I kind of like, but right now just want to be his friend. I want to be able to get to know him, but it’s hard not to come on too strong. I see him every couple days, and I hate how seeing him really cheers me up, and not seeing him makes me sort of depressed. I don’t want my mood determined by if I see a guy I like or not. I feel stupid talking to the other girls about it because I don’t want to seem boy crazy. I’m not boy crazy. I’m just tired of being alone.

Ok, so I get to go home this weekend. Yay! I’m excited to see everyone again, but also very VERY excited to see one of my bestest friends on Sunday. We have the whole afternoon planned, and I can’t wait.

I know this question has probably been asked a lot, but I’m asking it again. So… What are you looking forward to?