shoutfunctionnx3

alright, i’m slipping. the last four days have been absolutely chaotic. For one, i’ve been eating tons of junk food (both out of habit and because of cravings—and what’s worse is that i didn’t even enjoy it! i felt guilty the whole time, and eating just made me feel worse, which led to more eating cuz i felt like crap.. the viciouss cycle!)

Secondly, i haven’t worked out. maybe its because its a long weekend, (i normally wake up at around 5:45 and workout for about an hour before i go to school), and since i haven’t had to wake up early, the workout kinda got bumped out of my schedule.

so, here’s i am trying to get back on track:
1) drink more water! (at least 8 cups a day)
how i’ll do it:
1 cup when i wake up (before working out)
1 cup with breakfast
1 cup with lunch
4 cups after school (After school is usually when all the chaos happens, so I’ll drink water first thing home from school and i’ll be drinking water while i’m procrastinating, and instead of giving in to cravings/bad habits)
1 cup with dinner

if i’m really craving some taste, but am not hungry, i’ll add a tea bag or some lemon juice to it :)

oh and to help with the water intake, i’ll carry a water bottle around with me throughout the school day (which is when i tend to get the most dehydrated)

2) measure and snap a picture monthly
this’ll motivate me! i know it haha. the first picture (taken today!) was brutal, but i’ll be looking forward to next month’s (or maybe december’s, because by then, i’ll really be on my way to a healthier me!).

this’ll be it for noww. baby steps, i’m taking babystepss.

i know haven’t written here in a while & the last time i did, i was slipping on getting healthier, but i swear! i’ve made progress :D i’ve started to work out daily (30 minutes cardio in the AM, 30 minutes in the PM. just dancing around with music ringing through my ears :) i’ve come to look forward to my workouts, & it was certainly worth all the trial and errors it took to find one that i’d enjoy and do!)

i’ve also improved quite a bit on my diet.. although i think the improvements in my diet are due to the improvements in mood. unfortunately, i still tend to binge after stressful or monotonous days, & have a hard time dealing with cravings (most are impulsive or habitual, some i simply can’t decode) ... what do you do? what are your cravings like & how do you deal with them?

thanks xx

sighs truth be told, i’ve completely gone off track with my plan to be more active & eat healthier (...its not all bad, but for the the negatives pave right over the positives).

for the first week and a half (about two months ago), i exercised consistently (cardio, weights, stretching and all, for a total of about 45 minutes 5 days a week), but even though i wasn’t dreading it too much once i got started about ten minutes into it, i’ve gone back to old habits. i’d say 75% of the time its because i don’t feel motivated enough, & the other 25% would be because i don’t like exercising in the bathroom in order hide my efforts to being healthier through exercise from my family. its extremely frustrating, & i can’t completely focus on the workout. however, i feel like i have to hide it in order to avoid questions/comments/judgments from my brother & parents. (esp. because when i became vegetarian, i got tons of comments from my family and relatives on it, all saying that i’ll look like a stick, i’ll be unhealthy, or that i’ll eventually eat less and less and develop some kind of eating disorder).

i don’t know what to do. im stuck in a rut, and what little spirit i had to get healthier are now dampened, & the addition of another failure, less motivation, weight gain, and increased uncomfortableness in my clothes aren’t helping. its starting to feel hopeless. i feel even more reluctant to work out, and even when i set goals, i always delay them to another day, and never get to them.

on the flip side, i’ve been eating a bit healthier. breakfasts is usually oatmeal, lunch is bread (not so healthy), and dinner is usually vegetables (since i’m vegetarian, and decided to skip the bread to make up for lunch). the real problems are what i have inbetween meals. since im at school for the first half of the day, i can’t eat between breakfast and lunch. when i finally come home, i find myself diving for the couch & turning on the computer with junk food. i’ll sit there for 2-3 hours straight, indulging in junk food (& sometimes even healthy foods) excessively, until i feel extremely bloated (i’ve learned that my eating habits tend to be impulsive, and out of boredom/stress .. but im not sure what to do). then follows a series of self criticisms, shame, and disgust, which is followed by self-forgiveness and reassurance that i’ll eventually get there. the cycle repeats when i see another temptation, and just can’t help it.

what can i do? i’d love to hear some of your personal experiences/advice, it’d be a great help.

thanks in advance