sicktotheheart

about online dating.
There’s the issue of comprising my integrity. I wonder how worth it this is just to not be alone.
On the other hand, I think maybe I am simply being realistic by going out of my comfort zone in dating. It is hard to have such narrow restrictions to who you date, and I felt like I could not be pro-active in anyway before. I feel like I actually have options now.

I am still a dreamer, but I am acting to make things happen. I have created a cause for myself to be devoted to, and that has allowed me to focus on getting things done instead of pining for a fantasy. It has also created a light at the end of the tunnel for my life….if this “cause” goes well, it could help accomplish other goals.

accurate to “diagnose” yourself, but more and more I suspect I have an avoidant personality. I want to connect with people, but I simply cannot. Lately I feel like I have no personality, or no aspect of it worth showing to people. I feel like this black hole of miserableness. I’m convinced I come off as odd and people think I am weird and sad and they pity me, and it’s painful to realize.