sola4lang

I try to relax but I innately very anxious I think
So I can’t relax
I can’t even lie down still to listen to relaxation audio
omg what should I do?
My heart beat is also very irregular. Maybe I have a medical problem?
omgomgomg
why do I feel like this?
I just have to stop thinking so that I can relax and then
do my homework and succeed!

I define ‘being successful’ as being in the positive cycle of being healthy, happy, productive, social, etc.
I try relaxation audio I find on youtube and it helps me face myself and really figure out why sometimes I feel like nothing is going my way. When everything’s going my way, I don’t do relaxation.
I realize that the most important thing to get into that cycle is to just relax and accept the situation for what it is.
Sometimes I can’t finish the relaxation which is 10min long because the reality hits me and I feel too angry/sad/upset whatever.
Then I calm down and fininsh the relaxation therapy audio.
I just had this homework that I started studying for yesterday, but it’s due tomorrow and I’m scared to death about starting it.
I guess I should just break down the task into small bits and take the first step!

I just want myself to know:
I do not have anything else to worry about.
I can just stop thinking about anything else.
Anythingn else on my mind is not worth thinking about.
I should just relax.
I should just find the homeowork from my pi binder
and put it on my desk.
Grab the mechanical pencil.
Then, I should get my calculator from my bag.
Get my light stand back on the desk.
Turn it on.
Get a notebook to write on.
Get lecture notes for references.
Search on web to see if there are more notes.
Check the course syllabus for homework assignment range.
Start studying the material first.
Start studying the book first.
Then study the notes.
Then do homework.
For now, study the text book