1: started the applications for two schools
2: studying like crazy for the LSAT
3: met with the assistant dean of admissions for one school
getting there…
1: waking early enough to get things done before hanging out with friends
2: good bbq burgers
3: sunny days
4: dating a wonderful woman
5: letting go of toxic people
6: silly games for the ipad
1: slow morning drinking coffee and replying to emails
2: text messages from good friends
3: spending a few hours on a date
4: good dinner with friends
5: spontaneous hangout with a new friend and met her two cats
6: cool scooter rides home late night after a 100 degree day
7: falling asleep happy
8: taking a shot and asking someone out on a date
Being completely honest but not overly ridiculous is hard… meaning what I say and saying what I mean takes a great deal of courage and vulnerability.
I’m learning. I’ve gotten much better of letting ego driven dribble go, not letting the inner kid have its way, and not fishing or feeling people out before I say something. I’m not callous but their reaction is theirs and my words just need to be thoughtful, necessary, kind, and honest… and ideally, intelligent too.
1: slow lazy morning
2: coffee and cigarettes
3: great ride on my scooter
4: reading a book outside
5: good Al Anon mtg
6: dinner with friends
7: people watching
8: swapping stories of NYC
9: emails with a friend
10: falling asleep quickly and sleeping through the night
1: motivating myself to go to a mtg even though I was feeling pretty lazy
2: texting with a friend
3: phone calls with good friends
4: sitting outside people watching
5: reading a book by the pool
6: hot baths
7: popcorn
8: that my cats were safe inside during the fireworks
9: sleeping through the night
1: walking dogs and playing with them
2: phone call with a friend and clearing up misunderstandings
3: dinner and movie date
4: playing video games on a lazy afternoon
5: pizza
6: falling asleep pretty happy
1: good talks with friends
2: a meeting on resentments that got me thinking
3: sitting in the sun
4: swimming
5: pasta
6: text messages with a new friend
7: a black cat that comes by my apt to say hello on a daily basis
8: being happy for someone I used to know
9: tying up loose ends
1: Sleeping in
2: Taking a walk with a friend
3: Emails with friends
4: Realizing and accepting what I deserve… which is more than I’ve settled for in the past
5: David Sedaris
6: Perfectly made steak
7: Talking to friends
1: super lazy quiet days
2: a good mtg
3: dinner with my exgf/best friend
4: vanilla latte
5: chats with friends
6: falling asleep feeling calm and content with things
7: feeling myself reach a more serene state of mind lately… I hope this lasts
1: nice warm day to be out and about
2: studying outside
3: sun on my shoulders
4: spending my evening talking to someone new
5: rice
6: bad tv to help relax after a long day
7: emails with friends
8: writing
1: waking up to the sounds of birds and not traffic…
2: morning scooter ride
3: hanging out with friends
4: good dinner
5: Mythbusters
6: silly old cats who want to cuddle
7: text messages with good people
8: M&Ms
My first blog was on a site with some dorky name like “dear diary” – I hardly wrote in it – I was reading entries by other people and still wrote in a notebook. Then I jumped to blogspot and some others. Sometime later I started on Livejournal but that was more of a social bs thing than a real blog for me. I had friends on there and some of them I still know… I think that must have been around 2003. I deleted that one shortly after I started grad school and since then have used blogspot/blogger, tumblr, posterous, wordpress, and myspace, and finally my own website.
I still use notebooks or journals too for the things that are closer to my heart. But I’m fairly candid on my website about my life and what I think. It’s one of the ways I’ve been able to be more vulnerable and open about myself and knock down some of the walls I’ve had built up for so long. It helps… at least helps me.
1: long walks in the NW with a friend
2: coffee coffee coffee
3: nice evening scooter rides home
4: talking to new people
5: that awfully cute black cat
6: potstickers
1: slow mornings but getting things done
2: good music
3: walks
4: 3 dollar movies
5: popcorn
6: financially floating… amazingly enough
7: text messages from friends
Finished a story in March – sent it to several publishing places… and I don’t believe a 1st shot will get any recognition but it is something I’ve never tried. I write for myself… for fun… for whatever… so the notion of having it published was never a thing for me. I decided to take a shot.
Tough day
1: support from good people in my life
2: good burger and fries
3: long phone conversation with my best friend from high school
4: feeling and being able to feel without fear
5: crying without embarrassment in front of people
6: not replying to a toxic person who texts me to complain about someone else
7: T.S. Eliot
8: Mozart
9: Missed Connections for those moments when you just write something and it’s a mess but it’s important to throw it out into the universe
10: being vulnerable
11: remembering good times
1: writing
2: music
3: playing with cars with a 2 yr old
4: petting a dog after a mtg
5: talking with friends
6: indian food
7: nighttime scooter rides
8: my cats
1: acknowledging contributions that are good, bad, ugly, and indifferent
2: bacon and spinach for lunch
3: hot shower
4: hanging out with a 1 yr old
5: falling asleep immediately and sleeping through the night
6: making friends with a black cat in my complex
