see, i was always lacking in the confidence area growing up. as the fat/quiet girl in school, i didn’t start dating when all my peers did. i kept to myself. so i missed out on that whole essential part of growing up and learning who you are and what you want. in my 20’s i lost a lot of weight and began to socialize to try to ‘catch up’ on all i’d missed, but didn’t do a grand job of it. i’ve found i’m really just not a VERY outgoing gal (in a sense that my peers like to go out to clubs, parties, bars…etc…i prefer movies, shows, brunch, a morning jog, a long weekend a at a b&b…i was born w/an old sole). i’ve dated just a couple guys (i could count on 1 hand), did succeed in losing my virginity, though i come off as so green that most guys think i still am one. i just really need to get out there and experiment and experience. i like the idea listed below by tlaney about the Big 8. i should sit and write what i want, but since i haven’t had anything or anyone, how can i be so self-informed? it’s worth a shot though. anyone got any suggestions of how to meet people? how to fake it ‘til you make it? how to not be self-conscious?
spolice973's Life List
1. date more
well, sorta….i was doing security at the US open in NY two years ago and they promoted me to standing on the green near the tents, to the entrance to the club house. so TIGER had to walk right by me. he’s not as tall as i pictured, but then again, i’m a pretty tall girl (about 5’11”). anyway, after he left the green, he went into a little room outback for his media post interviewing, and i stood there securing the entrance way. it was pretty cool. i’m a golf fan and definitely a Tiger fan, so that was a pretty cool day for me to be that close to the magic! GO TIGER…hope he keeps up his winning streak this weekend!
10yrs ago i lost over 200lbs by dieting and exercising. but i picked up the bad habit of binging and purging while i was maintaining. it’s just progressed and progressed over the years. sometimes i seem to have it in control (does one EVER, really??) and sometimes it rules over my every thought. i’d like to really get a grip on this…i can’t picture myself being 80yrs old, and gorging on a 10,000 calorie meal then bending over a toilet with my fingers down my throat. therapy and stuff is just too costly and i’d need it for longer than my insurance would cover for. i see some sponsored links off to the side of this page and wonder if any are any good?? i’m desperate. this week i’ve been good. i had two days where i over ate during the day at work, and usually this sparks a HUGE binge day…but instead i talked myself into just going out and doing my workout as planned. sometimes i tend to just think, “well, i’ve already blew it, might as well finish it off”, but i was proud of myself for not doing that. now, i need to continue to do that and progress to just not over eating at all.