spreadyourwings

This is still going to prove DIFFICULT!!!!

I’m working two jobs. As a national retailer one of the companies I work for, on weekends, have decided to change ALL contracts to ‘flexi-time’ (which they all were- apparently when I signed mine)- though I don’t recall this being apparent on the scrap of paper which declared my hours. And because my original contract was ‘flexible’ they can make me work whatever days they want to make me work now. Well, this is ridiculous. I have worked for them for 5 years on weekends only. Now they expect to be able to tell me which days I can and cannot work. So if they want me in on a Monday- they can make me work a Monday, or a Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday or Friday, Saturday or Sunday even. Any day they choose, to ensure that they get the hours that they want done covered. There will be ‘no negotiation’.

Of course this poses a problem for me because I am currently working Monday-Friday at another job. The company will not declare that they will keep me out of this stupid ‘work a 7 day week’ policy and so I am being forced to an ultimatum- leave the job I actually quite like and be very poor. OR stay and run the risk of having to be in two places at once and get into serious trouble with the company I choose not to turn up for. I just don’t know what to do.

Last weekend I ended up in floods of tears because my managers weren’t taking my concerns seriously. Nor were they listening to me. Up until this point the company have been pretty great to work for. Now they are using the recession as an excuse to run a mock.

I am excellent at my customer service job. I run a clean show but recently I have been scared to say boo to a goose because they are cracking down on every little movement that we make. I feel like I am a new girl again. I really hate it. I don’t like my boss either because she talks to me like a child or something she has scraped off of her shoe. She has serious problems relating to other people and naturally nobody actually likes her. I suspect because of my tears, this weekend will be HELL for me.

Working two jobs (because I need the money)... also means that I see very little of Ben because by the time he comes in I’ve fallen asleep already. He lays next to me and watches me sleep. Last night he whispered in my ear ‘I wish we could go back to the old days’. I cried when he left for work just because I feel like I’m making such a mess of my life. I don’t know what to do!!!!

I’m not feeling much better at the moment. I am still shattered but I have a sneaking suspicion that that has a LOT to do with my stressful lifestyle.

I have changed my diet and I am really cutting down on the junk food. I’m pretty sure the past few days wont have made any impact on my weight but I have faith that it’ll work. I just need to get the exercise in now.

I am aware that my hips will need checking before I start on anything too strenuous so that’s something I need to do.

*VISIT DOCTOR + HOSPITAL FOR XRAYS

I want to start lifting weights again! I want to start walking more but this is all restricted due to a lack of time!!!! I guess I should start making more time!

1 cup of tea at work

Plus I carry a bottle with me through all my classes because you never know when shouting at children or laughing at their funny antics will get a bit too much :).

1 cup of water when I get in- daily ritual so far.

Ben makes me drink tea by the bucketload now in the evening which is probably keeping me awake. He’s like my gran. Typical Brit. ‘Cuppa tea will make it all right’. But I’m getting better at drinking water. As shown by the cup on my side that is now half empty (or half full depending on your perspective).