I'm doing 34 things
I think it’s wedging distance between myself and at least one family member. She may be afraid to talk to me for fear of being judged. It’s my own baggage that I’m just vomiting onto other people. I want to hone the attitudes and presentation that inspire others to feel – and be – safe with me.
thegirlnextdork's Life List
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1. finish a first draft
1 cheer2 people -
2. finish a graphic novel
1 entry . 1 cheer1 person -
3. think before i speak
605 people -
4. sew cloth diapers
2 people -
5. run a 5k
4 cheers2,788 people -
6. get a job
1 cheer12,562 people -
7. read 3 books a month
40 people -
8. try hookah
14 people -
9. sell art in a gallery
1 cheer3 people -
10. drive in the snow without fear
4 people -
11. Make a quilt
2 cheers1,236 people -
12. support my husband
13 people -
13. Breathe
3 cheers263 people -
14. Cope
2 entries . 2 cheers5 people -
15. be mindful
2 cheers166 people -
16. just get up and do it
2 cheers1 person -
17. have a child
678 people -
18. Buy a House
14,060 people -
19. identify my needs and work to get them met
2 cheers1 person -
20. be honest at all times
1 entry . 2 cheers2 people -
21. love unconditionally
1 cheer550 people -
22. build self-worth
2 cheers1 person -
23. maintain will power
1 entry . 1 cheer1 person -
24. finish a screenplay
1 entry36 people -
25. Learn Spanish
18,156 people -
26. make gluten-free bread
1 cheer1 person -
27. get a passport
1 cheer1,687 people -
28. visit another country
531 people -
29. get off Celexa
1 cheer0 people -
30. subscribe to a comic book
1 person -
31. complete the Chen tai chi sequence
1 cheer1 person -
32. Learn ASL
1 cheer402 people -
33. judge less
1 entry84 people -
34. Watch a David Lynch film
1 person
How I did it
It made me
proud 
How I did it: I actually organized the local venue first, which was rewarding in its own way. If there's not an event happening near you, I recommend this too (if you have the time and resources to do so). It's a good excuse to stop in at different comic and art supply stores and get to know the owners.See the tips below for a comprehensive list of the other "how"s. But basically, I showed up with a lot of survival gear, kept careful track of the time,… Read how I did it…
Recent entries
I have a tendency to let frustrations build and build and build before I try to establish boundaries with others – typically because I want to feel like a good person, be 100% supportive of something I’m not comfortable with, or let something go. But frustrations happen, whether I like it or not. The trick is to be honest about them – with myself AND a friend – before a crisis arises. Right now, I’ll inevitably say something insensitive and push them away; this comes out of the blue and creates feelings of hurt and betrayal. It’s my own fault! This is a pattern I want to end for the sake of the relationships I still have left.
It feels good to cope.
Given, it used to feel good – bizarrely validating, in a way – to just fly off the handle, give in to the most violent patterns of emotional whiplash, and feel miserable. Perhaps that’s what I needed to do for a while.
But when I want to cope, and I do it, I feel amazing. I can feel mental muscles growing. Yesterday my husband and I were having a talk about some big life decisions on the horizon – and I started to cry. “I’m not punishing you,” I said, “But I just feel like I need to cry right now.” I didn’t want my husband to avoid rational discussion for fear of upsetting me, nor did I want to perceive myself as weak. I let the tears fall and allowed myself to be mindful. I felt confused – that’s what it was. I had felt a huge surge of different thoughts and emotions. But I was determined to cope. I held my husband’s hand and just cried for a while, breathing deeply and allowing myself the space to feel what I felt.
I think I have come a loooong way.
