thepea

Truth is I probably have the life alot of people wish for – and what I hoped for. I have a successful business, a lovely house, great family and friends and am getting married next Summer to the man I love. The problem is that none of this is sort of finished. The house is still after 3 years a rennovation project (even though when finished it will be gorgeous), the business although now doing well after two years just needs the final puch from me, the family and friends are brill but I feel sometimes I am not good enough for them and so keep them at a distance. So in order for me to feel ‘successful’ I am going to try and embrace the lovely life I have and make every day count. I think I am almost scared to have all I do in case its taken away – what a silly girl!

I cannot even contemplate the amount of things I start and never finish. From house projects to hobbies to work stuff the list is endless. Its so frustrating but finishing something before I start a new doesn’t seem to be in my system. It leaves me feeling inadequate and like I never achieve anything, but if you added together all the unfinished stuff I have achieved loads. So this year will be my year of finishing stuff and sorting out my life. I had a day at the weekend finishing bits around the house and getting on top of paperwork, ironing, cleaning etc that had been left and left and it felt so good. So today I am going to finish work tasks that have been ongoing for ages and ages. I’m also going to put the finish touches to a bag I started making for myself. That onky leaves about 1,000 other things to finish!

I feel like a knackered slob at the mo so I’m going to try a few changes and see what happens.
Pea x