This one is a tough one for me.. I worry way too much what ppl think of me… its like I think their judging me or something. But in way it seems like I’m judging myself through how I think they see me. Its a bad habit. I know I should just live my life the way I want to live it and do what I want and not give a damn… but its hard still.
vantastic's Life List
-
1. Stop depending on having guys in my life to make me happy
1 entry1 person -
2. do something meaningful
1 cheer87 people -
3. Find someone who loves me for me
1 entry42 people -
4. make more friends
1 entry5,082 people -
5. Stop talking to myself (yes…I do that)
1 entry6 people -
6. live a healthier lifestyle
116 people -
7. not be lonely
130 people -
8. Send a message in a bottle
3,642 people -
9. Go to a strip club
227 people -
10. keep my virginity till i am in love
1 entry . 2 cheers4 people -
11. take a photo a day to document my life
2 cheers182 people -
12. stop thinking about "him"
2 entries214 people -
13. be more sexually adventurous
9 people -
14. love my body
1,093 people -
15. Volunteer for the 2010 Olympics in Vancouver
1 person -
16. find my talent
245 people -
17. figure out my purpose in life
1 cheer41 people -
18. accept myself for who I am and not who I wished I was
2 cheers3 people -
19. Stop caring what other people think of me
1 entry3,975 people -
20. run
1,127 people -
21. be more outspoken when someone offends me/challenges my beliefs
4 people -
22. Try teeth whitening strips
10 people -
23. ride in a hot air balloon
1,983 people -
24. finish my scrapbooking projects
21 people -
25. become comfortable with my sexuality
20 people -
26. go on a real date
90 people -
27. learn to give lap dances
33 people -
28. go more regularly to bikram yoga classes
1 entry1 person -
29. join toastmasters
1 entry183 people -
30. take a belly dancing class.
1 entry76 people -
31. stop living in the past
1 entry233 people -
32. get a great haircut
47 people -
33. take compliments better
118 people -
34. decide what the hell I would like to do with the rest of my life
6,964 people -
35. Practice random acts of kindness
758 people -
36. join the Mile High Club
901 people -
37. Think about sex less
2 people -
38. find the perfect bra
207 people -
39. network more with people
113 people -
40. have just one person tell me I have changed their life.
2 people -
41. fall asleep outside watching the stars with someone i care about
931 people -
42. Spend less time fooling around on the net and more time actually working
5,502 people -
43. stop settling for less than I really want
2 people
Gosh I’m still trying to reach this goal! Yesterday I ran into a guy from my past. At first when I saw him in a store I walked the other direction trying to put myself together and figure out what I was gonna do. I eventually went and found him again and started talking to him. Gawd, you know how it is sometimes when you don’t see someone for a very long time and then when you see them again its like seeing them for the very first time… and you totally had forgotten how amazingly gorgeous that person was! Grrrrr… I shouldn’t be thinking like this! I even initiated a hug with him! What was I thinking? And he told me that I should call him and our mutual friends to hang out this summer and I stupidly said yeah. Well, obviously I shouldn’t hang out with him right? He’s just gonna make me fall into the trap again. He’s one of those guys that can make me completely impulsive!
I finally got my job in march and since then have 2 jobs now. a full-time job as an event planner and a part-time job helping out a real estate agent. Jobs are good that’s all I have to say. Its nice to keep busy but it can be stressful too. I wish my pay was better but oh well.
